our television listings
RTE1
(Ireland's national fraudcaster. A television station of the liberal atheists, for the liberal atheists, by the liberal atheists. But financed through compulsory taxation on the Christian people of Ireland.)
10.25 Mad About You. I quite like Mad About You.
10.55 Doctor Phil. Agony Uncle on the morning schedule to teach children the important life skill of emoting insincerely to camera.
11.45 Shortland Street. Doesn't even have any redeeming sex scenes to make it worth watching while disapproving of it.
12.15 Doctors. Yawn.
12.45 Telly Bingo. The most intellectual programme on RTE.
1.00 News. With the Fembo Commie Pinkos.
1.20 Home And Away. Australian coastal porn intended to derange children while they're eating their dinners. Ironically as with all modern porn there are no redeeming sex scenes to make it watchable.
1.50 Neighbours. More Australian porn without sex scenes. This time of the inland variety, featuring similar subtle derangements as conveyed in Home And Away.
2.15 Eastenders. Brit sexless porn,. Nothing subtle here.
2.55 The Restaurant. I have a bad feeling this is a food programme.
3.25 Grand Designs. I have a bad feeling this is a home improvement programme.
4.25 Murder She Wrote. At last. Some real entertainment. Jessica is called in by the FBI to investigate the hijacking of a Russian cargo ship. She quickly concludes that the hijack was merely a cover operation to allow the resovietising Putin government in Russia to pass on atomic weapons to Al Qaeda. This discovery quite puts Jessica off her tea.
5.20 The Bill. Miffley goes on the run after Hawkins accuses him of GBH. Farquahr gets banged up to rights over the jewel heist. Milcheson can't figure out which end is up.
5.45 Achoo. I mean Nuacht.
6.00 The Angelus. The bells. The bells.
6.01 News followed by News For The Deaf (Hint: They shout it), and then followed by News For The Anally Retentive. (Hint: They shove their anti Catholocism up their own arses.)
6.30 Reeling In The Years. A wry look back on the Ireland of yesteryear with music of the period and images chosen by the people most responsible for destroying that Ireland. The programme is presented by RTE's in house Department For The Promotion Of Contraception, Cosmetic Surgery, Sexualised Children, Abortions, Divorce, Stabbings In The Streets, Drug Dealing In Every Irish School, A Population Prevented From Thinking For Itself And Sated With Anti Depressants, Daily Shootings, Corrupt Banks Robbing Generations Yet Unborn, Murders In Old Folks Homes, Murders In Irish Hospitals, Michael Neary Violating Women On The Operating Table At Drogheda Memorial Hospital, Nurse Mulholland Murdering People In Naas Hospital, Police Officers Saying If You Don't Give Us A Pay Rise We'll Take Bribes From Drug Dealers, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government Refusing To Name The Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Supporters Who Corruptly And Kleptocratically Collapsed Angle Irish Bank, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government Accepting Al Qaeda Members From Guantanamo Bay Prison As Irish Citizens, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government Minister Called Lenihan Announcing On Radio That The Scots Were Right To Release The Lockerbie Mass Murder Abdel Basset Al Megrahi, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government That Has Gifted Ireland With An Arab Pakistani Muslim Immigrant Population Of 250,000 Along With The Rulership Of Our Cities By Crime Gangs. Hmmm. I wonder has RTE made a mistake with this particular social vision. They've destroyed the church and look what they've given us instead. They've remade the world in their own image. The question is, are any of us willing to hold them accountable for it?
7.00 A Little Bit Showband. Featuring loathsome musicians who met RTE producers down the boozer and ended up with their own television shows.
7.30 Eastenders. Zeinab is angry with James for refusing to have sex with her. James is afraid that one night of passion may lead to him becoming a target for murderous revenge violence by Zeinab's father, uncles, brothers, cousins, grand parents, great grand parents, and infant baby brother Ahmed Abu Petrol Bomb.
8.00 The Rose Of Tweelee. Beauty pageant presented by Cannabis Darcy.
9.00 News. Here is the news. RTE is shite and I object to financing its agendas through compulsory taxation.
9.35 The Rose Of Tweelee. Second part of the most insufferable beauty contest ever devised. I bet the cracking Athy bird Charmaine Kenny wins though.
11.20 The Lives Of Mike. More from RTE's self worship season. This is the nearest thing to a genuinely religious programme on RTE today. My God, but they love themselves. It's a biography of RTE presenter Mike Murphy, a dreadful jeering liberal atheist, famous for his "hur hur" laugh and negligible intellect. The Irish Times television critic refers to Mike Murphy as "one of RTE's most popular arts broadcasters." So you know he's almost universally despised.
12.15 News. Barackkkkk gooddddd. Muslimsss niccccceeeeee. Do not adjust your television set. We are controlling ittttttttttttt.
12.20 Boston Legal. Show me the way to the vomitorium.
1.15 The Night Listener. Unwatchable Robin Williams film shown at an hour too late for anyone to watch it.
(Ireland's national fraudcaster. A television station of the liberal atheists, for the liberal atheists, by the liberal atheists. But financed through compulsory taxation on the Christian people of Ireland.)
10.25 Mad About You. I quite like Mad About You.
10.55 Doctor Phil. Agony Uncle on the morning schedule to teach children the important life skill of emoting insincerely to camera.
11.45 Shortland Street. Doesn't even have any redeeming sex scenes to make it worth watching while disapproving of it.
12.15 Doctors. Yawn.
12.45 Telly Bingo. The most intellectual programme on RTE.
1.00 News. With the Fembo Commie Pinkos.
1.20 Home And Away. Australian coastal porn intended to derange children while they're eating their dinners. Ironically as with all modern porn there are no redeeming sex scenes to make it watchable.
1.50 Neighbours. More Australian porn without sex scenes. This time of the inland variety, featuring similar subtle derangements as conveyed in Home And Away.
2.15 Eastenders. Brit sexless porn,. Nothing subtle here.
2.55 The Restaurant. I have a bad feeling this is a food programme.
3.25 Grand Designs. I have a bad feeling this is a home improvement programme.
4.25 Murder She Wrote. At last. Some real entertainment. Jessica is called in by the FBI to investigate the hijacking of a Russian cargo ship. She quickly concludes that the hijack was merely a cover operation to allow the resovietising Putin government in Russia to pass on atomic weapons to Al Qaeda. This discovery quite puts Jessica off her tea.
5.20 The Bill. Miffley goes on the run after Hawkins accuses him of GBH. Farquahr gets banged up to rights over the jewel heist. Milcheson can't figure out which end is up.
5.45 Achoo. I mean Nuacht.
6.00 The Angelus. The bells. The bells.
6.01 News followed by News For The Deaf (Hint: They shout it), and then followed by News For The Anally Retentive. (Hint: They shove their anti Catholocism up their own arses.)
6.30 Reeling In The Years. A wry look back on the Ireland of yesteryear with music of the period and images chosen by the people most responsible for destroying that Ireland. The programme is presented by RTE's in house Department For The Promotion Of Contraception, Cosmetic Surgery, Sexualised Children, Abortions, Divorce, Stabbings In The Streets, Drug Dealing In Every Irish School, A Population Prevented From Thinking For Itself And Sated With Anti Depressants, Daily Shootings, Corrupt Banks Robbing Generations Yet Unborn, Murders In Old Folks Homes, Murders In Irish Hospitals, Michael Neary Violating Women On The Operating Table At Drogheda Memorial Hospital, Nurse Mulholland Murdering People In Naas Hospital, Police Officers Saying If You Don't Give Us A Pay Rise We'll Take Bribes From Drug Dealers, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government Refusing To Name The Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Supporters Who Corruptly And Kleptocratically Collapsed Angle Irish Bank, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government Accepting Al Qaeda Members From Guantanamo Bay Prison As Irish Citizens, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government Minister Called Lenihan Announcing On Radio That The Scots Were Right To Release The Lockerbie Mass Murder Abdel Basset Al Megrahi, A Corrupt Kleptocratic Fianna Fail Government That Has Gifted Ireland With An Arab Pakistani Muslim Immigrant Population Of 250,000 Along With The Rulership Of Our Cities By Crime Gangs. Hmmm. I wonder has RTE made a mistake with this particular social vision. They've destroyed the church and look what they've given us instead. They've remade the world in their own image. The question is, are any of us willing to hold them accountable for it?
7.00 A Little Bit Showband. Featuring loathsome musicians who met RTE producers down the boozer and ended up with their own television shows.
7.30 Eastenders. Zeinab is angry with James for refusing to have sex with her. James is afraid that one night of passion may lead to him becoming a target for murderous revenge violence by Zeinab's father, uncles, brothers, cousins, grand parents, great grand parents, and infant baby brother Ahmed Abu Petrol Bomb.
8.00 The Rose Of Tweelee. Beauty pageant presented by Cannabis Darcy.
9.00 News. Here is the news. RTE is shite and I object to financing its agendas through compulsory taxation.
9.35 The Rose Of Tweelee. Second part of the most insufferable beauty contest ever devised. I bet the cracking Athy bird Charmaine Kenny wins though.
11.20 The Lives Of Mike. More from RTE's self worship season. This is the nearest thing to a genuinely religious programme on RTE today. My God, but they love themselves. It's a biography of RTE presenter Mike Murphy, a dreadful jeering liberal atheist, famous for his "hur hur" laugh and negligible intellect. The Irish Times television critic refers to Mike Murphy as "one of RTE's most popular arts broadcasters." So you know he's almost universally despised.
12.15 News. Barackkkkk gooddddd. Muslimsss niccccceeeeee. Do not adjust your television set. We are controlling ittttttttttttt.
12.20 Boston Legal. Show me the way to the vomitorium.
1.15 The Night Listener. Unwatchable Robin Williams film shown at an hour too late for anyone to watch it.
posted by heelers | 2:04 AM
3 Comments:
"Shortland Street. Doesn't even have any redeeming sex scenes to make it worth watching while disapproving of it."
Your honesty is refreshing. However, I hope you don't watch programs with redeeming sex scenes in front of MC Hammy. The young and delicate should be protected from filth.
-MJ
MJ!
The salient feature in the above television listings is that I correctly selected the winner of the Rose of Tralee title.
J
Yes, you did! And she's lovely. She looks like my cousin Lisa when Lisa was a child - those luminous blue eyes, the clear skin with freckles.
If I were a betting woman, I wouldn't bet against you in a beauty pageant. :)
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