the empire strikes back

Dzherzhinsky looked at my computer.
"Heelers my old apple crumble," he mused in his distinct Russian accent, "you've been hacked."
My jaw dropped.
"No way."
"Way."
"How bad is it?"
"Very bad."
"Like a virus?"
"Like someone wanted to bomb you off the planet."
When he had gone I had time to reflect on the vicissitudes of existence.
I'd thrown a few punches lately.
There are a few suspects we might reasonably consider in any serious hacking incident.
The cops, the mob, the broads, the banks, the Jihadis, Ireland's corrupt kleptocratic Fianna Fail government, devil worshippers on the island of Jersey, Tony O'Reilly, Independent Newspapers, the free masons, the Johnston Press, Judge Liberal...
They're all out to get Heelers.
And Dzherzhinsky swears it's not an accident or a casual bit of nuisance hacking.
Hilarious.
I suddenly feel terribly important.
So the empire struck back alright.
The only question is.
Which empire?