The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Friday, March 26, 2010

the second most illegal thing i ever wrote

It happened a few weeks ago.
I was giving a recap on The Heelers Diaries of the story about public relations person Monica Leech and the Fianna Fail government Minister who gave her hundreds of thousands of Euro in public money to design websites no one ever visited.
I got the government Minister mixed up with one of his colleagues.
There are two Fianna Fail government Ministers with similar names.
Well similar-ish.
I wrote that Martin Cullen had been the one who had dealings with Monica Leech.
In fact it was Michael Martin.
No, no, no.
What I wrote was that Michael Martin was the one involved with Monica Leech's contracts.
But actually it was Martin Cullen.
I did it again.
You see how easy it is for these things to happen.
Anyhoo, it was definitely Martin Cullen who awarded the Leech contracts.
Michael Martin had nothing to do with it.
You should have seen me running home from Clarkes Menswear the next day to re-edit the article when Vivian Clarke informed me of my mistake.
Boy was my face red.
And it wasn't anything to do with the gout either.
Now gentle readers, it's only fair to make you aware that Independent Newspapers were recently fined 1.87 million Euro for genuinely and professionally and competently trying to report various issues connected with the awarding of such large sums of public money to Monica Leech.
The fine was imposed by Judge Eamon DeValera, himself a descendent of the founder of Fianna Fail, a man also called Eamon DeValera.
You can see why the case infuriates me.
For the first time in my life I find myself on the side of Independent Newspapers.
I ain't never gonna forgive Judge Liberal for that one.
Anyhoo again.
If Independent Newspapers can be fined millions for getting the names in the story right, what on earth is the tariff for bringing an entirely innocent Minister into the equation?
Truly I have a talent.


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