among the immortals

"Coleridge is the business," museth I with all the joy of one who has comparatively late in life discovered a new work of art..
"Samuel Taylor Coleridge?" enquires my literary friend. "Really? I didn't think his poems would be your cup of tea at all. Do you not think they're a bit old hat? Water, water everywhere and ne'er a drop to drink, and all that. I mean give me a break. When I was at school I used to just wish the ancient mariner would shut up and die. I'm with the crewmen who want to throw him overboard at the third verse. Him and his albatross."
"Shut up and die. That's a Rihanna song I think. She wrote it in tribute to Samuel Taylor Coleridge. But I'm not talking about Samuel Taylor Coleridge. Or Rihanna. I'm talking about Plavka Coleridge."
"Who he?"
"She is the lead singer with a 1990s music combo styled Jam And Spoon."
"Oh."
"Ride In The  Night. You must have heard it."
"Er no. I missed that particular gem."
"It's a classic."
"I thought you were an intellectual."
"Real intellectuals like Jam And Spoon."
"Heelers, you're finally losing it. I mean whatever sense of taste you  ever had."
"I'm telling you if Lord Byron was alive today, he'd be in Jam And Spoon. Or more correctly if he was alive in 1995."
"And Shakespeare would be working for the BBC, I suppose."
"Nah. The conformist gauleiters at the Beeb would have weeded out Shakespeare in the first interview... Ah Plavka. Thou art indeed more fair than all the tresses of Neiera's hair. Thy beauty it has brought me home to the grandeur that was Greece and the glory that was Rome. Well you know what I mean."