more unused footage from the eagle has landed

Interior. Radl's office. Radl is talking to his aide Hofer. Paratroops are parading in the Square below the window.

Radl: Any messages?

Hofer: Ze Fuhrer has sent you a telegram.

Radl: What does it say?

Hofer: You are all a bunch of Willies.

Radl: Damn. I wanted to be a Helmut.

Hofer: Ze Fuhrer also says he wants us to stop pronouncing W's as V's and to learn how to say a th rather than a z.

Radl: (Exploding) Vat? Now? At ziss late stage? Ze only alternative to zese hokey ridiculous accents is to actually learn German. Do zose idiots at ze High Command not realise how difficult German is? Now! With the war lost, they want us to actually learn German. It's madness. Who would even consider going to a film called Der Adler Ist Gelandet. Madness, I tell you.

Hofer: How did your meeting go with Himmler.

Radl: Ze fools. Zey want me to kidnap Churchill.

Hofer: What will they do with him if you get him?

Radl: Germany is bankrupt. Vee have spent a fortune on ziss war. Now ze war is lost. Zey probably hope to look for a ransom or something, I mean somezing, so they can break even on the deal.

Hofer; And what do we do now?

Radl: I need to find a man of incredible bravery, who can overcome impossible odds, pass as British, and bring Churchill back alive. By ze way, who is zat tough, charismatic, oddly likeable paratroop Colonel parading his men up and down ever zere?

Hofer: Zat is Bill Oddie from ze Goodies.

Radl: No, not him. Ze ozzer one.

Hofer: Zat is Colonel Hans Steiner of ze 12th Fallschirmjager Alpine Corps.

Radl:What do you know about him?

Hofer: His mother was an American and his father was Michael Caine.

Radl: Well ziss is a turnip for ze books.