pinball liberals

Morning English lesson at the Bagel Cafe in Lucan.
My student is a young Polish man called Jacob.
"I don't understand Ireland," said Jacob. "If people commit a murder here, the police talk to them, and let them go, and announce that a file is being sent somewhere. And that's it. In Poland if there's a murder, even if you're just a suspect, you're going to be in a police station for the next three months. Here it's crazy. In Dublin you've got teenage guys walking around the streets boasting about the murders they've committed. Why do the Irish let this happen?"
I weighed his question.
"It's a mindset among our Judges and certain powerful people in our country," I told him cautiously. "The Judges are liberal atheists. Some are ex communists. Who knows where they found the values they've used to undermine the law? But the general public never agreed to it. The Judges in this country have more or less remade the law in their own image. We never really had a choice."
My friend looked genuinely puzzled.
"But why do these guys want to let murderers wander around the streets?" wondered Jacob.
I thought for a moment.
"It's a mindset," I said. "A liberal mindset. The judges don't think the murderers are really responsible for what they've done. And many of the Judges hate our society, or hate Christian society, more than they hate murderers. Maybe that's it. Or maybe the Judges are just genuinely evil. But the liberal mindset is part of the explanation anyway. Another part of the explanation is that our Judges are out of control. They appoint each other. They are never in any way accountable to the general public. There is a hidden establishment in Ireland. An establishment of liberal atheists. I don't know if they're Free Masons. Devil worshippers. Old style Marxists. Some strange admixture of the three. Or what they hell they are. But they exist. They govern us. And they are hidden. I say they're hidden because they've never won an election or submitted themselves to public scrutiny. But still they rule us. And their malign incompetence beggars belief. Everything they touch turns to violence. The Irish Times is currently reporting on the case of Gerald Barry. He committed murders. He led a mob that committed murders. He raped people. He blinded an old age pensioner. I consider the blinding of the pensioner to be another murder. Nothing Gerald Barry could do would keep him in jail for long. Liberal Judges, Liberal Lawyers, Liberal Juries, Liberal Social Workers and Liberal Prison Wardens kept ensuring he was released. And we the general public, the citizenry, the victims, we finance these liberals. We finance the liberal lawyers who got Gerald Barry out of jail. Because Gerald Barry and thugs and murderers like him get free legal aid from our government. None of them pays for their own legal defence. Which means the liberal lawyers simply write themselves a blank checque and the Irish people have to pay it. We paid to keep Gerald Barry free to kill and kill again. Had it been up to the general public, Gerald Barry could have been locked up forever or executed after the first murder. But the liberals knew better. Finally he murdered a seventeen year old Swiss girl called Manuela Riedo. Just before he killed Manuela, Judge Liberal had released Gerald Barry on bail after his most recent rape of yet another girl. Now this week the Irish Times is reporting all this as if it's a scandalous surprise. As if the Irish Times hasn't for decades been an integral part of what the Liberal Judges have done to this country. As if the Irish Times itself wasn't the cheerleader in chief for Liberal Judges, Liberal Lawyers, Liberal Juries, Liberal Social Workers, Liberal Prison Wardens and the b-st-rd system they have created. If the Irish people ever appoint me as their ruler, the first thing I'll do is incarcerate all the liberals in the legal system who colluded to release Gerald Barry. All of them. I'll incarcerate them in a jail cell with Gerald Barry. Just so they'll know what they've been inflicting on the general public. Yeah Gerald Barry murdered Manuela Riedo. But the real crime happened after. When a Liberal Judge had the gall to apologise to Manuela's parents on behalf of the Irish people. How dare he. As if the Irish people had killed their daughter. This liberal judge was just another pious hypocritical swine. This murder wasn't caused by the Irish people. This murder was caused by the Liberal Judges and their acolytes who have hijacked our society. They have ensured that Gerald Barry was fee to kill, kill, kill, rape, rape, rape, and kill again. They have ensured it. And no one else."
"You think it's like this?" said Jacob.
"Listen Jacob," I said. "In this country it's nearly impossible to be convicted of murder. Someone stabs a person twenty times and is allowed to claim oh yeah I stuck a knife in him twenty times but I never meant to kill him. We have a State pathologist responsible for autopsies on murder victims who specialises in giving get out of jail free cards to murderers. She'll do an autopsy and say oh yeah he was stabbed twenty times but he had an underlying heart condition so maybe that killed him. Or oh yeah he had his head stomped to mush but he'd drunk twenty pints of beer so maybe the alcohol in his system was a contributory factor. Or in a case of a baby who was brought to hospital recently and bled to death from her head, oh yeah that could have been a rare type of brain haemhorrage and maybe the parents didn't beat the living shit out of the baby at all. You know what? The doctors who suspected the parents beat the living shit out of the baby, the doctors who suspected the parents murdered their baby, although they aren't allowed to call it murder here, the liberals call it shaken baby syndrome, well those doctors ended up apologising to the parents in court. In which case I'd better apologise to them myself because I suspected they beat the living shit out of their baby as well. In fact I suspected they murdered their baby. And I still do."
Jacob's hour was up so off he went.
Ah yes.
English lessons with the Mighty Heelers.
They reach the parts other English lessons seem to miss.
As I drove out of Lucan I began to sing.
My song was a parody of Pinball Wizard.
I sang with strange high gusto.
Elton John would have been proud.
My song went:
"The scum are on the streets
They all are out on bail.
They're lodging an appeal.
They know it will not fail.
They go into Judge Liberal
And they hear his hammer fall.
That deaf dumb and blind judge
Sure likes releasing Scumballs.
He's a pinball wizard.
Part of the machine.
A pinball wizard.
But does he really know
What justice means?
There's been another murder.
Twenty stab wounds in the head.
Judge Liberal thinks it's an accident.
You can't bring back the dead.
He plays by intuition.
That liberal's pretty mean.
His conception of justice
Sure verges on the obscene.
He's a pinball liberal.
Part of the machine.
He hasn't got a clue
What real justice means.
He lets em out of jail
Because he thinks society's cruel
But this hardcore liberal judge
Is really just a fool.
He opens up the jail cells
He lets the killers free
Whether it's murders assaults or rapes
He blames society
He plays by intuition
He always makes the call.
That deaf dumb and blind judge
Sure plays a mean pinball.
He's a pinball liberal.
Part of the machine.
A pinball liberal.
But he doesn't care at all
What real justice means..."