The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

those amazing x men

Mild mannered poet James Healy is flicking through a book on herbal remedies
The book was left at the Chateau de Healy by Padre Peter who is part of the humorous wing of the Catholic church.
James alights on the following passage:
The properties of Garlic are not yet fully understood. Regular infusions of this herb will stave off a whole host of bodily ailments. Scientists consider that garlic has been statistically proven to improve circulation through the human heart. There is anecdotal evidence that using garlic regularly may also have positive effects on the libido. In fact some say it will turn you into a love god from the planet zorgotron.
The noble Heelers' gentle preraphaelite features took on a most striking poignancy.
"I like the smell of those apples," he murmured cryptically.
Camera dissolve to Heelers buying garlic.
Montage of Heelers returning home, taking garlic, falling behind a table, and reemerging as the super hero known as Garlic Man.
Series of scenes where people he knows run away from him shouting: "For God's sake cut down on the garlic."
Then he figures out he's meant to use his new powers to fight crime.
Scene where he presents a pile of unconscious criminals at the police station.
The Chief of Police says: "Thank you Garlic Man."
Heelers vanishes back into the night from whence he came.
The Chief of Police turns to the other cops.
"Crumbs," he says, "that guy really stinks."


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