The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Sunday, July 28, 2013

legalisation of murder out takes


Sauntering on Main Street.
A gentleman farmer approaches.
"Eh Jayums."
"That's my name."
(Actually it really sort of is my name bold readers. In a Kildare accent anyway.)
The farmer had taken hoult of my arm.
Gently but firmly enough.
When he spoke his voice was low.
"Someone asked me to tell you to be careful what you're saying about the TD."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, eh, have you written something about him?"
The noble Heelers furrowed his brow in thought.
I had a hunch what he might have been referring to.
"Nothing much," I said. "The occasional oblique reference to him on my blog as an abortionist parliamentarian whose party has just legalised the murder of children in the Republic of Ireland."
"There you go. That's it. Get rid of that."
"Who asked you to contact me?"
"I'm not saying."
"Was it a Fine Gaeler?"
"Actually it was someone from Fianna Fail and they were looking out for you really. They were afraid you might get sued."
I fell around the place laughing.
The notion of Fianna Failers, most of them viscous abortionists themselves, running pass defence for a Fine Gaeler abortionist was too risible for words.
Those amoral kleptocratic schweinhunds will have been cheering me to the echo.
"Will you delete it and steer clear of anything like that in the future?" persisted the farmer.
"I'm not going to promise you anything," I answered distantly.


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