hence wilt thou lift up a caffe latte

Quaffing coffees at the Cafe Nero with the ghost of Thomas Hardy.
"Your novels are too depressing," quoth me.
"How would you know, you've never read them," sez he.
"I dipped in," quoth me.
"You didn't really," sez he.
"Well I saw the film version of Tess of the d'Urbevilles," quoth me.
"Doesn't count," sez he.
I start forward suddenly in my seat.
"Look, look," I breathe, "it's Ridey Ride MacRide the Ride."
Sure enough the beautiful manageress has appeared behind the counter.
"Heelers, you're the last of the great romantics," sighs Thomas Hardy.
"I know," I reply.