The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Wednesday, September 09, 2015

at home with the geldoffs

(Channel Four have announced that they are looking at filming a new Reality TV show featuring live round the clock footage of musician Bob Geldoff living with two Syrian familes at his flat in London. The move comes after Mr Geldoff announced he was going to lead by example in inviting the two families of Syrian  refugees into his home. I imagine the first episode will play out something like this.)

Bob: "Alroight Mohammed. It's toime for dinner. Where's yer woife?"

Mohammed: "My wife cannot join us in this room. She will eat in the other room with the children."

Bob: "Why?"

Mohammed: "Because she is a woman."

Bob: "That's so incredibly bloody condescending. Your wife, I mean yer woife, will eat here with us. Just like my present mistress does."

(The Muslim beheads Bob Geldoff.)


Well folks, after years of  inflicting debauching subhuman dross on the general public, I think Reality TV may finally have found its niveau d'excellence.


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