The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Sunday, September 06, 2015

today they said


Pope Francis: "I appeal to every town and village in Europe to give a home to just one immigrant family."

James Healy: "We've been doing that Frank. Even the smallest town or village in Ireland has immigrant families living in it. It's worse in the cities. They've triggered a white flight out of Dublin. And nationwide they've established dozens of psychoticised mafias which are terrorising the general populace while dividing Ireland into personal fiefdoms. Irish police admit to 26 international mafias operating here. The real figure is higher. Your intervention on behalf of the IRA's people trafficking division is most surreal. (cf the IRA's associates in Al Qaeda, the Chinese Triads, Cosa Nostra and the Russian mafia.) Thankfully Frank you only issued an appeal. It wasn't a command, was it? By they way Frank, you're not the Pope. The ouster of Pope Benedict was illegal.

Martina Devlin (writing in the Irish Independent): "We must end fortress Europe."

James Healy: "Martina Devlin does not speak for Ireland or for Europe. She speaks for a bankrupt newspaper group owned by a white collar criminal called Denis O'Brien who made his fortune by bribing then government minister Michael Lowry of Fine Gael to give him mobile phone service provision contracts for the Republic of Ireland dirt cheap. Incidentally Fine Gael has just given Denis O'Brien another billion dollars in illicit public funding this year by taking over the collapsed AIB bank which went bust lending money to Denis O'Brien's newspaper group. Once nationalised, AIB cancelled Denis O'Brien's newspaper group's debts. That is to say Fine Gael forced me to pay the gambling debts of white collar billionaire criminal Fine Gael financier Denis O'Brien. Corrupt Fine Gael Prime Minister Enda Kenny must have had a great larf down the boozer about that one."

Bob Geldoff: "Oy'm going to give a home to two immigrant families in moy flat in London."

James Healy: "That's not really a kindness. There's a higher death rate in your f--king flat than there is in Syria."

Frances Fitzgerald (member of Fine Gael, Irish government minister): "The Irish people demand we take in more immigrants."

James Healy: "This is Gotterdamerung for Fine Gael. The twilight of the gods. They know they've finished off their own pissant little abortionist political party. So their thinking is, why not finish off Ireland too. Better to rule in hell than serve in heaven, eh Fine Gael? Of course some of us may demur from linking the fate of our country to the fate of Fine Gael by granting citizenship of Ireland to every Jihadi who demands it. But Frances Fitzgerald says we are demanding the admission of more and yet more immigrants to Ireland, and who are we to argue? Since when have the people had a right to say what their government should do? Since when have the people had a right to say what they really think? About anything?"

Archbishop Diarmuid Martin: "This is the greatest refugee crisis since World War Two."

James Healy: "Well duhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh-hhhhhh-hhhhhhh! I've missed you Archie. The greatest refugee crisis since World War Two, eh? Well a soviet era infiltrator of the Catholic Church like yourself would be well placed to judge. Hmmm. There are other similarities to World War Two which you might consider. The present influx of Muslim migrants who despise Christianity and detest freedom, the very ones demanding entry to our countries having been trafficked to our borders by various IRA linked mafias, bear a near cosmic similarity in their attitude to us as the atheistic Nazi Germans and your old friends the atheistic Commie Russians who thought their presence in our countries was of right and who came here to rule us without our consent simply by swarming over our borders. But I'm looking forward to you doing a Bob Geldoff on it and offering to put up a few Syrian and Afghan Jihadis in your palace instead of forcing me to live beside them here in Kilcullen. I hope you get some of those gitchee Jihadis, you know, the ones who were dumping Christians off the boat into the Mediterranean last week. I assure you Archie, if it's Christians they're after, you will be quite safe."

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