The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, March 11, 2017

idea for a novelty music video in aid of charity


The song is a parody of Park Life which was originally recorded by a British music combo styling themselves Blur. Our song is called Star Trek. A lot of the song is spoken rhythmically like the original. Proceeds raised from the video will be donated to Save The Feldwebels.

Actor With Appealing Cockney Voice:
"Confidence is a preference
Over armchair indolence
For most starship captains
In..."

Blur Blokes (chanting):
"Star Trek"

Cockney voice:
"Overacting is nothing shameful
Although some of these plots are quite a handful
It's more or less what we aim for
In what is known as..."

Blokes:
"Star Trek"

Blokes sing Chorus:
"All the Klingons
So many Klingons
They all go round and round
Round and round in their
Star Trek"

Cockney voice:
"Captain Picard is making his way home
Through the neutral zone
Keeping a wary eye out for  Romulan Warbirds
They love a piece of him..."

Chorus:
"All the plot twists
So many plot twists
And time travel is impossible
So most of it is pure nonsense
In this
Star Trek"

Cockney voice:
"It's not about your magnificent silken clad thighed women crew members in incredibly short skirts, you know
Or your phasers
Or your transporters
Or your tractor beams
Or any thing else that's a plot staple but like time travel actually impossible
And it's not about those famous recurring plot themes
Which go round and round and round..."

Chorus:
"All the captains
So many captains
And nobody remembers any of them
Except Captain Picard and William Shatner
In their
Star Treks"


Cockney Voice:
"And it's not about those recurring evil villains
Who every week are thinly veiled depictions of each other
Or thinly veiled depictions of God
Where God is an alien
Or a super computer
Or something else ungodly
Which villains and plot themes recurred basically because the owner of Star Trek Gene Roddenberry
No disrespect
Believed more in drugs than in the creator of the universe"

Chorus:
"All the Klingons
And occasional Romulans
And hanger ons
And all their also rans
They
All all overact
Overact
Overact
In their
Star Trek"

Cockney voice:
"William Shatner considers himself a very good looking man
In spite of the fact that he wears a wig
And a bra to hold in his body
(Shouting) You should cut down on your Pork Trek mate
Captain Jean Luc Picard on the other hand
Goes for a more minimalist look
He says it once
He says it loud
I'm bald and I'm proud"

Chorus:
"All the film versions
So many film versions
But there was only one that came close
To the zestful entertaining self confident idiocy of the TV series
Which was Wrath Of Khan
Which i freely admit
Was nearly a good
Nearly
A good
Star Trek"

Voices and Music fading out:
"Doo dooo, nerdle nerdle nerrrr
Star Trek
Doo doo, nerdle nerdle nerdle nerrrrr
Star Trek"

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