fanfare for the c'mon man

 

(the Joe Biden diaries)

My lackey attendant valet thingie woke me up this morning at eleven thirty with some darn fool notion that I should get out of bed.

"C'mon man," I told him.

And I meant it.

Putin (Russian President) says he's invented a vaccine that kicks ass.

At the sumit conference meeting thingie last month I asked him how it works.

He said: "We send the KGB round and beat them black and blue."

I asked did that activate the body's immune system.

He said: "No. But after a session with the KGB they don't care about Covid anymore. It's all about perspective."

I wish we could do that in America, the United States, land of our fathers, here, thingie.

Why am I the first Biden in a thousand generations to enjoy rasperberry Squishies?

My Vice President (Kamala Harris) is supposed to be sorting out the non crisis at our southern borders.

I'm afraid to pressure her for results in case she calls me white or something.

If she doesn't buck up I'm going to have to say "C'mon man" to her too.

Whew. I'm bushed. That's enough diary writing for one day. I need a rest. I just wanna lie down in that oblong rectangular bed thingie and sleep for a week.

Etc etc.