The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, June 30, 2012

family guy

Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is sitting on the couch.
The baby from the television cartoon Family Guy scutttles in and sits beside him.
The baby says:
"Watchya doin Archie? Plannin a new coup against the Catholic Church from within? Hmmm? Planning to run another Bishop out of office by using your atheistic media allies to label him a concealer of child abuse? Planning another general apology for child abuse designed to impute guilt to the Catholic Church of yesteryear, ie the one you didn't control? Hmmm? Archie? Planning to copperfasten the presumption of guilt you and your atheistic media friends have contrived for any priest or nun accused of abuse by some scruff looking for a pay out? Planning to hang em all? Planning to continue apologising for crimes the Catholic Church never committed while ignoring the 99.99 percent of sex abuse cases which involved abusers with no connection to the Church? Those 9999 victims out of every ten thousand don't count do they Archie? Archie? Why are some victims more important than others? Why are the vast majority of victims, the ones abused in family homes or at the hands of atheistic or devil worshipping State employees, why are the 99.99 percent of victims who weren't abused by Catholics, why aren't they entitled to publicity, recompense or justice? Archie? Hmmm? Archie? Watchya doin? Watchya doin there Archie? Getting a few ideas together there for a new Catholic Church with you in charge? Hmmm? Archie? Why are Public Relations consultants paid executive salary to work for you? Why are you forcing ordinary priests to take pay cuts while you pay executive salaries to PR people and to the army of spies (Spivs surely - ed note) you've sent to every parish posing as community workers? I mean I don't want to go casting no aspoyshuns. Archie? Hmmm? Archie why are you doing all this? What's your next move Archie? Why does the bankrupt anti Catholic Irish Times and the bankrupt anti Catholic Irish Independent, and the morally bankrupt Stalinisst monopoly State broadcaster RTE who have all spent forty years seeking the end of Christianity in Ireland, laud you so? Hmmm? Archie? Archie? Hmmm? Hmmm? Hmmm? How is your brother Archie? I mean the famous pro Soviet former political editor of the Irish Times Seamus Martin who spent the Cold War openly rooting, and propagandising, for the Russians, how is he? Do you keep in touch? Archie? Hmmm? Do you keep in touch with your brother Archie? Hmmm? Archie? Hmmm?"
The baby's voice gets progessively squeakier as he poses these questions.
I am quite struck by the whole thing.
Perhaps Cartman was wrong about Family Guy after all.


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