The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, March 14, 2009

special guest blogger saint paul

Set your mind on the higher gifts. and now I am going to put before you the best way of all. Though I command languages, both human and angelic - if I speak without love, I am no more than a gong booming or a cymbal clashing. And though I have the power of prophecy, to penetrate all mysteries and knowledge, and though I have all the faith necessary to move mountains - if I am without love, I am nothing. Though I should give away to the poor all that I possess, and even give up my body to be burned - if I am without love, it will do me no good whatever. Love is always patient and kind; love is never jealous; love is not boastful or conceited, it is never rude and never seeks its own advantage, it does not take offence or store up grievances. Love does not rejoice at wrong doing, but finds its way in the truth. It is always ready to make allowances, to trust, to hope and endure whatever comes. Love never comes to an end. But if there are prophecies, they will be done away with; if tongues, they will fall silent; and if knowledge, it will be done away with. For we know only imperfectly, and we prophesy imperfectly; but once perfection comes, all imperfect things will be done away with. When I was a child, I used to talk like a child, and see things as a child does, and think like a child; but now that I have become an adult, I have finished with all childish ways. Now we see only reflections in a mirror, mere riddles, but then we shall be seeing face to face. Now I can know only imperfectly; but then I shall know just as fully as I am myself known. As it is, these remain: faith, hope and love, the three of them; and the greatest of them is love.

Friday, March 13, 2009

james the dragon slayer

Parking my car at the Naas town centre car park.
There came a mildly insistent tapping on my driver's side window.
I looked.
And lo!
The prettiest girl in Naas was grinning in the window at me.
I say she was the prettiest girl in Naas.
It was a snap judgement.
I'm fairly sure she was.
Bright challenging eyes, mischievous mouth and long brown hair.
And she was smiling most winsomely.
At me.
What an intoxicating mixture.
Eyes, mouth, hair and smile, all on the one girl.
Here's larks, thinks I.
The prettiest girl in Naas beckoned me to exit the vehicle.
What could she want?
Could she have spied me passing and fallen headlong in love at first sight?
I have long been of an optimistic frame of mind when it comes to such matters, so I was inclined to play along.
She said: "I've gotten into a bit of trouble parking my car. Will you have a look?"
I essayed good natured bonhomie.
Sort of like Dick Dastardly trying to pass himself off as Saint George.
We walked over to her car.
I took a step back.
Her car, a fifteen year old Ford, was wedged at a peculiar angle, half in and half out, of a parking space.
Her front left hand bumper was about a centimetre from the side of a shiny new BMW.
Her rear right hand bumper was almost touching the wing of a black Mercedes.
I'm telling you folks, Albert Einstein couldn't have put that car into that space in that way.
To get it there, Girly Girl must have changed the laws of space and time.
The prettiest girl in Naas looked at me expectantly.
"Could you straighten it up?" quoth she adorably.
Well gentle travellers of the internet.
She hadn't exactly asked me to slay a dragon.
I scrambled into the front seat.
Her engine was still running
I took my bearings.
Foot on the clutch.
Some thoughts struck me.
If I damage the BMW and/or the Mercedes, who's liable?
If I damage the prettiest girl in Naas's car, who's liable?
I mean who will end up paying the cost of the repairs?
I looked over my shoulder.
In the back seat, the most handsome serene baby you've ever seen, gave me an encouraging smile.
I shook my head.
Truly I have a talent.
Imagine Judge Liberal hearing this case.
"Mr Healy, you have inflicted severe damage on three vehicles and caused undue stress and anxiety to an innocent child. Not to mention sorely disappointing Girly Girl. I am sentencing you to life without parole. You will share a cell with Ibrahim Buwissir and Sean Fitzpatrick."
Bloody hell.
Back to the present.
I eased off the clutch and with all the bravura and elan of a young Saint George, I rescued Girly Girl's car from its entrapment and reparked it safely.
I scraped no walls.
I damaged no vehicles.
I terrified no babies.
Saint George himself couldn't have done it better.
Dick Dastardly though would at least have gotten the girl's phone number.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

the power and the taily

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

A BIT IRISH (by Medbh Gillard)

"Well doc, my problem is I'm too much of a giver."

Sunday, March 08, 2009

child of grace