The Heelers Diaries
the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet
About Me
- Name: heelers
- Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland
Saturday, May 22, 2010
the poetic manifesto
half heard melodies at dawn
dreams or the traces of dreaming
a woman's name said soft like breathing
memories of faces gone
footsteps in the hall on winter nights
sadness in the heart where love has been
softness on the fields after a storm
shadows bright with remembering
we will go
through cowardice to bravery
into the timeless eye of mind
across the ungovernable sea
to where all poems have their end
and their beginnings naturally
come with me
by my friends you shall know me
Former politician Alan Dukes has spoken out calling for every Bishop in Ireland to resign.
His words were clearly indicative of support for Archbisop Diarmuid Martin's attempts to hound the entire Catholic hierarchy of the Republic of Ireland from office.
The entire Catholic hierarchy with the exception of Archbishop Diarmuid Martin of course.
So a new friend for Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
Alan Dukes no less.
For many of us, the contribution of Alan Dukes to the present pogrom against the church struck an oddly ironic chord.
Why on earth would Alan Dukes think he was in a position to make such a call?
His posturing is well nigh cosmically delusional.
Here is the news.
Alan Dukes is not a respected public figure.
Alan Dukes is not a respected commentator on anything.
Alan Dukes is not held in high regard by any thinking person or by any religious person.
Who is he?
Alan Dukes was formerly the head of Ireland's one time main opposition party Fine Gael.
Under Alan Dukes and his predecessor Garret Fitzgerald, Fine Gael was effectively dechristianised.
Christians such as the anti abortion campaigner Alice Glenn were run out of the party.
Fine Gael became the home of joyless reprobates advocating every depraved shibboleth of atheistic liberalism from murder of the unborn to the creation of life in test tubes, from divorce to legalised drug use, from promiscuity culture to the present forty year pogrom against the Catholic Church.
They destroyed much.
They created nothing.
Alan Dukes also pioneered a unique parliamentary approach for an Irish opposition party in that he guaranteed our corrupt kleptocratic party of government Fianna Fail, that he would not oppose them if they stuck to certain policies.
Alan Dukes party Fine Gael has never recovered from his dechristianisation of it, nor from his clueless failure to permit it to actively oppose government policy while it was still the main opposition party.
Fine Gael has all but evaporated before our eyes.
Alan Dukes himself lost an unlosable parliamentary seat in the region where I live.
Alan Dukes lost this seat by a few hundred votes simply because of stories in the media alleging he had been engaged in a particularly unseemly affair with one of his secretaries.
Alan Dukes was later prevailed upon by our corrupt kleptocratic Fianna Fail government to be front man in Fianna Fail's bail out of the exponentially corrupt Fianna Fail financial institution known as Anglo Irish Bank.
Alan Dukes, the former chief of the opposition party Fine Gael, the former chief of Fine Gael whose policy as chief of Fine Gael was specifically not to offer any opposition to the corrupt kleptocratic Fianna Fail government, this same Alan Dukes has now been rewarded with a hundred thousand dollar a year sinecure heading up the defunct Fianna Fail entity Anglo Irish Bank.
The presence of Alan Dukes, at the head of Anglo Irish Bank, a position he was requested to take by Fianna Fail, has enabled Fianna Fail to pretend some vestige of probity for Fianna Fail's decision to risk adding more than 60 thousand million dollars of debt to the Irish economy in order to bail out Fianna Fail's personal bank Anglo Irish Bank.
The presence of Alan Dukes at the head of Anglo Irish Bank, has enabled Fianna Fail to press forward with the Fianna Fail policy of looting the treasury for a bail out that will in any case not succeed because folks Anglo Irish Bank is already gone, ain't nobody nowhere ever gonna do business with dem cats again, the presence of Dukes in any case gives just a veneer of credibility to a 60 billion dollar burglary, effectively compelling the Irish people to take on the gambling losses of Fianna Fail's personal bank Anglo Irish Bank, while Fianna Fail continues to conceal the identities of those Fianna Fail supporters who were given multi million dollar loans from Fianna Fail's personal bank Anglo Irish Bank.
The Fianna Fail policy of bailing out Anglo Irish Bank drawing down utterly unrepayable borrowings against the lives of unborn generations of Irish people, this policy which Alan Dukes has expressly facilitated and lent his credibility to, this suicidal policy of economic nihilism I say, is an act of arrant criminality unsurpassed in the history of the nation.
It will mean the anihilation of Ireland's economy and the end of our existence as a free country.
I wonder how all these liberal are gonna enjoy being ruled by Muslims.
I wonder.
The Fianna Fail utilisation of public money to bail out a Fianna Fail Bank, now headed up by Alan Dukes, is in fact a criminal act of national asset stripping, a financial coup d'etat by profligates, adulterers and philanderers, a lunatic act of national desecration, a veritable economic throat slashing, a calumnious treachery, unprecedented not just in Ireland's, but in any nation's, history.
The Fianna Fail bail out of Anglo Irish Bank, overseen by former Fine Gael chief Alan Dukes, has overnight spent Ireland into the third world.
Alan Dukes draws a salary of at least a hundred thousand dollars a year from Anglo Irish Bank.
At the same time Alan Dukes also receives a pension stemming from his time in the Irish parliament.
At the same time Alan Dukes receives yet another pension for his time as a government minister.
I put it to you gentle travellers of the internet.
Alan Dukes is not fit to tie up the bootstraps of the Bishops he has attempted to slander.
Alan Dukes is part of a profligate political class, the visible parliamentary rump of a darker liberal atheistic conspiracy hidden within our media, our Judiciary and upper echelons of our Civil Service, a dessicating corruptive cadre of usurpers whose Will To Power has left Ireland mired in debt, pornography, drugs culture, child abuse, murder, rape, and the violent society.
Alan Dukes is part of this worthless fervourless atheistic order which is passing away.
Alan Dukes is nothing.
I call on Alan Dukes to repent of his crimes and to apologise to the Bishops and to the Christian people of Ireland for his betrayal of us all.
diarmuid martin's attempt to hijack the catholic church in ireland on behalf of atheistic liberals
There once was an Archbishop called Diarmuid,
Whose faith had less bounce than his perm had.
He sought to lay low,
Twenty Bishops in a row,
and a Pope, and a Cardinal. What a gonad!
Whose faith had less bounce than his perm had.
He sought to lay low,
Twenty Bishops in a row,
and a Pope, and a Cardinal. What a gonad!
Friday, May 21, 2010
the moaneeka lech laugh in
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin, the Ayatollah Komeini, the Dalai Llama and Rabbi David Dalin had organised a secret meeting to discuss the possibility of all the great religions getting together to promote world peace.
The meeting was being held on an executive jet high above the Atlantic.
The only other people on board were the crew.
The religious leaders' secret conference had just begun when there was an explosion in one of the plane's engines.
"We're going down," screamed the pilot over the intercom. "We've got to lose weight or we'll all die."
At this point Rabbi Dalin stepped to the door of the plane.
"Hear oh Israel," he said, "the Lord our God is one God. Long live the faith of Abraham."
And he jumped out of the plane.
"That was good," screamed the pilot. "But it's not enough."
The Dalai Lama stepped up to the door.
"May all mankind know the courage, serenity and truth of meditation," he said. "Long live the Buddha."
And he jumped out of the plane.
"Still not enough," screamed the pilot desperately.
The Ayatollah Khomeini stepped up the door.
"You can't make an omelette without breaking some eggs," said the Ayatollah Khomeini. "Long live the Catholic faith."
And he chucked out Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
The meeting was being held on an executive jet high above the Atlantic.
The only other people on board were the crew.
The religious leaders' secret conference had just begun when there was an explosion in one of the plane's engines.
"We're going down," screamed the pilot over the intercom. "We've got to lose weight or we'll all die."
At this point Rabbi Dalin stepped to the door of the plane.
"Hear oh Israel," he said, "the Lord our God is one God. Long live the faith of Abraham."
And he jumped out of the plane.
"That was good," screamed the pilot. "But it's not enough."
The Dalai Lama stepped up to the door.
"May all mankind know the courage, serenity and truth of meditation," he said. "Long live the Buddha."
And he jumped out of the plane.
"Still not enough," screamed the pilot desperately.
The Ayatollah Khomeini stepped up the door.
"You can't make an omelette without breaking some eggs," said the Ayatollah Khomeini. "Long live the Catholic faith."
And he chucked out Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
the monica leech beeyotch in
A reader has contacted me to point out rather whimsically that journalist Fiona Looney whom I yesterday described as an anti Catholic beeyotch for her twenty years at Independent Scuzzpapers sneering on command at Catholicism, had today written an article in the Daily Mail, actually praising the Catholic Church's contribution to Irish education.
My analysis of Fiona Looney's newly minted Catholicism remains the same.
It's fake.
It's a crock.
It is not worth the Daily Mail marketing strategy paper it's printed on.
a news report you won't see on cnn
All week we've been watching the Thai army murder the citizens of Thailand in the streets of Bangkok.
There has been copious reportage.
The picture being presented by CNN, Sky News, CNN, France 24, Euronews, Russia Today, and the Nazi channel Al Jazeera, is culpably false.
Only on the Chinese communist channel CCTV have I encountered a vestige of honorable reporting of the situation.
Here is the news.
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are not "renegades."
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are not "rioters."
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are not "anti government protestors."
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are in fact the people who have won the last three elections in Thailand.
They are democracy protestors.
They are the legitimate government of Thailand.
Look.
Thailand has a population of around fifty million people.
Three million of these are Muslims.
There has been a Muslim separatist terror war raging in Thailand's southern provinces for seven years.
In that time an estimated five thousand Buddhist Thais have been murdered.
Hundreds of thousands of Buddhist Thais have been forced to leave their homes.
They have been forced to leave their homes by the Muslim immigrants they permitted to live in their country.
Ironic, what!
In 2006 a Muslim army general called Sonthi Boonyaratglin seized power in Thailand in a coup d'etat.
Since then this Muslim army general has been the de facto power in Thailand.
Three millon Muslims rule the 47 million Thais.
Yet somehow the Thai people have refused to lie down.
In three successive rubber stamp elections staged by the Muslim army general in an attempt to legitimise his coup, the Thai people have returned the very candidates the Muslim army general was trying to hound out of office.
The victorious candidates have been the representatives of those people you see being murdered in the streets of Bangkok this week.
These democratically elected politicians have not been allowed to assume office.
Thailand continues to be governed by an unelected appointee of the Muslim army general who has usurped total power in the country.
The legitimate prime minister of Thailand, a man called Thaksin Shinawat, has been driven into exile through frivolous accusations of financial irregularities.
Thailand's constitutional court, acting at the behest of the Muslim army general who runs Thailand, took the step in 2007 of banning the political party which Thai people had insisted on re-electing every time they were given a chance to vote.
Nonetheless every chance they get, the Thais persist in voting for candidates associated with that party and with exiled prime minister Thaksin Shinawat.
This week, they're dying for it.
They're dying for their presumption in electing the political representatives they want to govern them.
And only the Chinese commies of CCTV hinted at this truth.
Only on CCTV did I hear an interviewer challenge a representative of the Musim general who has hijacked Thailand by saying: "Of course the present prime minister of Thailand has not been elected. He was installed by the leader of a coup."
I thought rather well of the Chinese interviewer for saying this.
On judgement day if she needs an ally, I will speak for her.
There has been copious reportage.
The picture being presented by CNN, Sky News, CNN, France 24, Euronews, Russia Today, and the Nazi channel Al Jazeera, is culpably false.
Only on the Chinese communist channel CCTV have I encountered a vestige of honorable reporting of the situation.
Here is the news.
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are not "renegades."
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are not "rioters."
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are not "anti government protestors."
The people being murdered in the streets of Bangkok are in fact the people who have won the last three elections in Thailand.
They are democracy protestors.
They are the legitimate government of Thailand.
Look.
Thailand has a population of around fifty million people.
Three million of these are Muslims.
There has been a Muslim separatist terror war raging in Thailand's southern provinces for seven years.
In that time an estimated five thousand Buddhist Thais have been murdered.
Hundreds of thousands of Buddhist Thais have been forced to leave their homes.
They have been forced to leave their homes by the Muslim immigrants they permitted to live in their country.
Ironic, what!
In 2006 a Muslim army general called Sonthi Boonyaratglin seized power in Thailand in a coup d'etat.
Since then this Muslim army general has been the de facto power in Thailand.
Three millon Muslims rule the 47 million Thais.
Yet somehow the Thai people have refused to lie down.
In three successive rubber stamp elections staged by the Muslim army general in an attempt to legitimise his coup, the Thai people have returned the very candidates the Muslim army general was trying to hound out of office.
The victorious candidates have been the representatives of those people you see being murdered in the streets of Bangkok this week.
These democratically elected politicians have not been allowed to assume office.
Thailand continues to be governed by an unelected appointee of the Muslim army general who has usurped total power in the country.
The legitimate prime minister of Thailand, a man called Thaksin Shinawat, has been driven into exile through frivolous accusations of financial irregularities.
Thailand's constitutional court, acting at the behest of the Muslim army general who runs Thailand, took the step in 2007 of banning the political party which Thai people had insisted on re-electing every time they were given a chance to vote.
Nonetheless every chance they get, the Thais persist in voting for candidates associated with that party and with exiled prime minister Thaksin Shinawat.
This week, they're dying for it.
They're dying for their presumption in electing the political representatives they want to govern them.
And only the Chinese commies of CCTV hinted at this truth.
Only on CCTV did I hear an interviewer challenge a representative of the Musim general who has hijacked Thailand by saying: "Of course the present prime minister of Thailand has not been elected. He was installed by the leader of a coup."
I thought rather well of the Chinese interviewer for saying this.
On judgement day if she needs an ally, I will speak for her.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
archy and friends
There was a flurry of interest down on our way when a media apparatchik for Archbishop Diarmuid Martin told RTE radio that he thought that Archbishop Diarmuid Martin was doubting his vocation and might resign.
Some people sought my comments on the matter.
"The guy on RTE is a plant," I told them bluntly. "Diarmuid Martin is a veteran of the Vatican diplomatic corps. He's a streetfighter. He hasn't spent forty years infiltrating the church just to walk away now. He knows how to play these games. He's teasing those of us who've figured out what he is. But he ain't going anywhere. Not until he has completed the work of destruction for which he came."
It had been a busy few days for Archy.
At the weekend a Nazi beeyotch called Emer O'Kelly had written in the Sunday Independent that "Archbishop Diarmuid Martin was too good a man to be a Catholic."
Her endorsement was followed swiftly by one from Paul Hewson, a singer who styles himself Bono.
Ah yes.
Rats jumping on to the sinking Archbishop.
That old gag.
And now Bono.
Bono is most famous for having persuaded international banks to cancel the debts of African and Asian dictators, thereby enabling the most murderous regimes on the planet to continue their permanent persecutions of their own people, and extending the civil wars of Africa and Asia by at least another two decades.
Bono is also famous for persuading Western governments to throw billions of dollars at supposed Aids charities in Africa.
This money went to Aids charities while Africans were being mown down in the streets by Islamist and Marxian regimes in Sudan, Zimbabwe, the Congo, Somalia, Angola, and everywhere else in that charnel house continent.
But giving money to supposed Aids charities makes western pop stars feel good about themselves.
As far as they're concerned there's no need to prioritise forcing African dictatorships to desist from genocide.
Africans have always lived with violence.
They can't expect any better.
Let them eat condoms, eh Bono?
Aids is just such a groovy cause celebre.
How on earth could anyone expect a man of Bono's depth to care tuppence about mass murder.
Yes.
Bono is somewhat less famous for his pronouncements on religion than he is for making the hell of Africa worse than it's ever been.
And you can tell from the tenor of my remarks that I do not welcome Bono's attempts to present himself as an objective commentator on Catholic Church issues while running pass defence for Archy.
I have a passing acquaintance with Bono's religious poses.
He has stated that the Gnostic gospels, ie the fake ones written hundreds of years after the death of Jesus, are just as valid as the real gospels.
For Bono, grooviness is more important than truth.
His views are similar to those of Dan Browne the writer of The DaVinci Code.
Here is the news.
At no time in his life has Bono ever been a member of the Catholic Church.
He has never been a believer.
He has never once sacrificed a smidgen of his ego for the truth of God.
He has never risked his life, his comfort, or even his grooviness, to proclaim a single sacred tradition of our beautiful ancient faith when a room full of his friends were smearing it.
He has risked diddlysquat.
He is not fit to tie up the boot straps of the church he presumes to stand in judgement upon.
He is not a Catholic.
He is a nothing.
Bono's entire mindset and intellect is summed up by his cult of masturbatory self promotion, his juvenile hippy self worship, his unctious atheistic presumption.
Bono is his own idol.
And as far as Bono is concerned the truth doesn't have to be true.
It only has to be entertaining.
So I say again.
Bono has never been a Catholic.
Yet like an increasing number of liberals and atheists, hoormasters and hippies, pornographers and drug dealers, he likes occasionally to strike the pose, to convey the utter lie, that he is indeed a Catholic and therefore qualifed to comment on Catholic Church affairs.
And that's what he was doing in the Daily Star.
A few weeks ago we had the spectacle of life long harridan Fiona Looney falsely claiming in the Daily Mail that she too is a Catholic.
It was as though the bitch's life's work sneering at the church for Independent Newspapers, had never happened.
And now we get Bono in The Daily Star.
Bless.
They do get around don't they.
These hagerdotal liberal skanks.
The Daily Star was an odd paper for Bono to choose for his lionisation of Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
The Daily Star is owned by British porn baron Richard Desmond who has some sort of publication deal with Independent Newspapers proprietor Tony O'Reilly to produce the Irish edition.
Richard Desmond knows an awful lot about child abuse because the pornographies he disseminates are a major cause of it.
And here was Bono, in The Daily Star, waxing compassionate about the victims of child abuse.
Not all victims mind.
Not 99.99 percent of the victims.
No.
Just the 0.01 percent of victims whose abusers were posing as Catholics.
Bono.
Are you there?
Yeah you.
I'm talking to you Harpsichord.
Now listen good.
You're a white washed sepulchre.
I know you know.
But I want you to know I know.
And so we go on.
There is another fact about the Daily Star which made it a strange choice for Bono in the dissemination of his pass defence propaganda on behalf of Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
The Daily Star is edited by Ger Colleran.
Ger Colleran is himself famous for an historically deceitful falsehood which he perpetrated on RTE television against the Catholic Church.
Ger Colleran was permitted to broadcast to the nation the following grotesque piece of incitement to hatred.
"Children," said Ger Colleran, "were screaming for help in every Catholic Church presbytery in Ireland."
It was a malign, malicious, duplicitous cowardly lie.
Ger Colleran got away with it.
Because there is no standard of truth in RTE.
And the law is ceasing to exist in the Republic of Ireland.
Ger Colleran, a liar, a porn baron's lacky, a scum.
One of your own, eh Bono?
Now here's what Bono had to say in The Daily Star about Archy:
"Diarmuid Martin is a fine man and there are many others like him in the church. But it's got to come clean. There's no room for manoeuvring."
Really Bono?
The church has to come clean?
What you mean is that the church has to admit to trumped up crimes being invented and then ascribed to it by lying atheistic cocaine using pornographers like you and Emer O'Kelly and Ger Colleran and Judge Yvonne Murphy, and all the rest of the miserable swinish herd vying to destroy the faith of our fathers.
Bono, you and your friends have destroyed much and created nothing.
You have decultured Ireland to the gates of hell.
You have misled young people into thinking their sexualities are a religion.
You have denied a generation access to the church they needed more than any other generation have ever needed it in human history.
You have left the children defenceless against the snares of satan.
In thirty years you have all but undone 1500 of Christianity.
Bono, you and your pals are not judges of the Catholic Church.
On judgement day, our forefathers whom you have sought to judge, will rise up to judge you.
For your crimes are greater than anything that has come before.
Repent Bono.
Repent you miserable cur.
You're starting to annoy me.
Some people sought my comments on the matter.
"The guy on RTE is a plant," I told them bluntly. "Diarmuid Martin is a veteran of the Vatican diplomatic corps. He's a streetfighter. He hasn't spent forty years infiltrating the church just to walk away now. He knows how to play these games. He's teasing those of us who've figured out what he is. But he ain't going anywhere. Not until he has completed the work of destruction for which he came."
It had been a busy few days for Archy.
At the weekend a Nazi beeyotch called Emer O'Kelly had written in the Sunday Independent that "Archbishop Diarmuid Martin was too good a man to be a Catholic."
Her endorsement was followed swiftly by one from Paul Hewson, a singer who styles himself Bono.
Ah yes.
Rats jumping on to the sinking Archbishop.
That old gag.
And now Bono.
Bono is most famous for having persuaded international banks to cancel the debts of African and Asian dictators, thereby enabling the most murderous regimes on the planet to continue their permanent persecutions of their own people, and extending the civil wars of Africa and Asia by at least another two decades.
Bono is also famous for persuading Western governments to throw billions of dollars at supposed Aids charities in Africa.
This money went to Aids charities while Africans were being mown down in the streets by Islamist and Marxian regimes in Sudan, Zimbabwe, the Congo, Somalia, Angola, and everywhere else in that charnel house continent.
But giving money to supposed Aids charities makes western pop stars feel good about themselves.
As far as they're concerned there's no need to prioritise forcing African dictatorships to desist from genocide.
Africans have always lived with violence.
They can't expect any better.
Let them eat condoms, eh Bono?
Aids is just such a groovy cause celebre.
How on earth could anyone expect a man of Bono's depth to care tuppence about mass murder.
Yes.
Bono is somewhat less famous for his pronouncements on religion than he is for making the hell of Africa worse than it's ever been.
And you can tell from the tenor of my remarks that I do not welcome Bono's attempts to present himself as an objective commentator on Catholic Church issues while running pass defence for Archy.
I have a passing acquaintance with Bono's religious poses.
He has stated that the Gnostic gospels, ie the fake ones written hundreds of years after the death of Jesus, are just as valid as the real gospels.
For Bono, grooviness is more important than truth.
His views are similar to those of Dan Browne the writer of The DaVinci Code.
Here is the news.
At no time in his life has Bono ever been a member of the Catholic Church.
He has never been a believer.
He has never once sacrificed a smidgen of his ego for the truth of God.
He has never risked his life, his comfort, or even his grooviness, to proclaim a single sacred tradition of our beautiful ancient faith when a room full of his friends were smearing it.
He has risked diddlysquat.
He is not fit to tie up the boot straps of the church he presumes to stand in judgement upon.
He is not a Catholic.
He is a nothing.
Bono's entire mindset and intellect is summed up by his cult of masturbatory self promotion, his juvenile hippy self worship, his unctious atheistic presumption.
Bono is his own idol.
And as far as Bono is concerned the truth doesn't have to be true.
It only has to be entertaining.
So I say again.
Bono has never been a Catholic.
Yet like an increasing number of liberals and atheists, hoormasters and hippies, pornographers and drug dealers, he likes occasionally to strike the pose, to convey the utter lie, that he is indeed a Catholic and therefore qualifed to comment on Catholic Church affairs.
And that's what he was doing in the Daily Star.
A few weeks ago we had the spectacle of life long harridan Fiona Looney falsely claiming in the Daily Mail that she too is a Catholic.
It was as though the bitch's life's work sneering at the church for Independent Newspapers, had never happened.
And now we get Bono in The Daily Star.
Bless.
They do get around don't they.
These hagerdotal liberal skanks.
The Daily Star was an odd paper for Bono to choose for his lionisation of Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
The Daily Star is owned by British porn baron Richard Desmond who has some sort of publication deal with Independent Newspapers proprietor Tony O'Reilly to produce the Irish edition.
Richard Desmond knows an awful lot about child abuse because the pornographies he disseminates are a major cause of it.
And here was Bono, in The Daily Star, waxing compassionate about the victims of child abuse.
Not all victims mind.
Not 99.99 percent of the victims.
No.
Just the 0.01 percent of victims whose abusers were posing as Catholics.
Bono.
Are you there?
Yeah you.
I'm talking to you Harpsichord.
Now listen good.
You're a white washed sepulchre.
I know you know.
But I want you to know I know.
And so we go on.
There is another fact about the Daily Star which made it a strange choice for Bono in the dissemination of his pass defence propaganda on behalf of Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
The Daily Star is edited by Ger Colleran.
Ger Colleran is himself famous for an historically deceitful falsehood which he perpetrated on RTE television against the Catholic Church.
Ger Colleran was permitted to broadcast to the nation the following grotesque piece of incitement to hatred.
"Children," said Ger Colleran, "were screaming for help in every Catholic Church presbytery in Ireland."
It was a malign, malicious, duplicitous cowardly lie.
Ger Colleran got away with it.
Because there is no standard of truth in RTE.
And the law is ceasing to exist in the Republic of Ireland.
Ger Colleran, a liar, a porn baron's lacky, a scum.
One of your own, eh Bono?
Now here's what Bono had to say in The Daily Star about Archy:
"Diarmuid Martin is a fine man and there are many others like him in the church. But it's got to come clean. There's no room for manoeuvring."
Really Bono?
The church has to come clean?
What you mean is that the church has to admit to trumped up crimes being invented and then ascribed to it by lying atheistic cocaine using pornographers like you and Emer O'Kelly and Ger Colleran and Judge Yvonne Murphy, and all the rest of the miserable swinish herd vying to destroy the faith of our fathers.
Bono, you and your friends have destroyed much and created nothing.
You have decultured Ireland to the gates of hell.
You have misled young people into thinking their sexualities are a religion.
You have denied a generation access to the church they needed more than any other generation have ever needed it in human history.
You have left the children defenceless against the snares of satan.
In thirty years you have all but undone 1500 of Christianity.
Bono, you and your pals are not judges of the Catholic Church.
On judgement day, our forefathers whom you have sought to judge, will rise up to judge you.
For your crimes are greater than anything that has come before.
Repent Bono.
Repent you miserable cur.
You're starting to annoy me.
when the revolution was expected in china
in the garden of my father
i first heard the gunshots from tiananmen square
i will never drink again of beauty
without hearing first the crying of the dying there
we will pray sometimes in the evening
as the shadows lengthen into years
for there are prayers much softer than silence
and silences softer than tears
the deliberate blindness of barack obama
The reports came in on the late night news channels.
Another possible car bomb in New York.
As per usual the reporters made no mentions of Al Qaeda, Jihadis or Muslims.
It looked like just another attempted mass murder that the media of the free world didn't want to attribute to its perpetrators.
I waited for an hour for some clarification on the reports.
There was nothing on CNN.
Sky had mentioned the suspicious vehicle initially, shown some pictures, and now weren't saying a word about it.
What had happened?
This was of course a huge story.
In the light of the recent attempts by a Pakistani Al Qaeda thug to blow up the offices of Viacom along with thousands of people in Times Square, why on earth would this story be shelved?
The reason that Abu Bin Paki Al Killyouall had targeted Viacom is because Viacom is the maker of the cartoon Southpark whose humorous take on Muslim psycopathies has caused Muslim psychopaths no end of chagrin.
Bless.
They are indeed sensitive plants these Mussies.
Let's be clear.
The Mussies were willing to blow up a few thousand people because they didn't like an episode of Southpark.
The real crime is letting them live among us.
So why was the unfolding story about the follow up attack being buried?
I could find nothing more about it on any of the satelite channels all night.
Even if the suspicious vehicle had been disposed of safely, some reportage on the incident was surely appropriate.
The following day, the same satelite channels and now the newspapers had nothing tp report about the incident.
It was being ignored.
As though it never happened.
It was only on the internet that I found details of what precisely had transpired.
Yet another car with gas cannisters visible in the back seat had indeed been illegally parked on a busy New York thoroughfare.
Several city blocks had been cordoned off by police.
Buildings close to the vehicle were evacuated.
So there's no mystery.
It was an Al Qaeda panic sowing mission.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
Paralysing the city of New York for an evening is a victory for Al Qaeda.
Paralysing the city of New York with no loss of their own personnel is an even bigger victory for Al Qaeda.
Clearly President Barack Obama's administration, the media groups, the Mayor of New York Mike Bloomberg, and even the police are in multi culti denial about the attacks which Al Qaeda continues to mount against us.
And their denials are Al Qaeda's biggest victory of all.
And here's the rub.
Every news entity that even troubled to mention the second suspicious vehicle in a week to be found parked illegally in New York with gas cannisters visible in the back seat, every reporter and commentator without exception, all of the twits bar none, erroneously referred to the incident in their scanty, nay paltry, accounts as a... "false alarm."
An unnamed New York police officer supposedly told Reuters that there had never been anything to worry about.
Reuters attributed the following cretinous politically correct drivel to the NYPD: "There was no danger. It was just someone parking his car where he didn't realise he wasn't supposed to park it."
He knew where was parking it alright.
He knew precisely what he was doing.
The name of the owner of the car was not published.
This means he's a Muslim.
Or a pal of Muslims.
For Al Qaeda has learned that there are no shortage of non Muslim low lifes willing to take money to mount a panic sowing mission.
The criminals know they won't have to die.
They know they will be very unlucky if they are detained at all.
They know there will be no consequences.
So New York continues to be awash with suspicious vehicles and innocent peace loving little Mussies who just didn't realise they weren't supposed to park their gas cannister laden vehicles beneath the No Parking signs at Time Square.
Ah bless.
It could happen to anybody.
Here is the news.
Barack Obama and the appeasers of the western media are between them losing us this war.
Another possible car bomb in New York.
As per usual the reporters made no mentions of Al Qaeda, Jihadis or Muslims.
It looked like just another attempted mass murder that the media of the free world didn't want to attribute to its perpetrators.
I waited for an hour for some clarification on the reports.
There was nothing on CNN.
Sky had mentioned the suspicious vehicle initially, shown some pictures, and now weren't saying a word about it.
What had happened?
This was of course a huge story.
In the light of the recent attempts by a Pakistani Al Qaeda thug to blow up the offices of Viacom along with thousands of people in Times Square, why on earth would this story be shelved?
The reason that Abu Bin Paki Al Killyouall had targeted Viacom is because Viacom is the maker of the cartoon Southpark whose humorous take on Muslim psycopathies has caused Muslim psychopaths no end of chagrin.
Bless.
They are indeed sensitive plants these Mussies.
Let's be clear.
The Mussies were willing to blow up a few thousand people because they didn't like an episode of Southpark.
The real crime is letting them live among us.
So why was the unfolding story about the follow up attack being buried?
I could find nothing more about it on any of the satelite channels all night.
Even if the suspicious vehicle had been disposed of safely, some reportage on the incident was surely appropriate.
The following day, the same satelite channels and now the newspapers had nothing tp report about the incident.
It was being ignored.
As though it never happened.
It was only on the internet that I found details of what precisely had transpired.
Yet another car with gas cannisters visible in the back seat had indeed been illegally parked on a busy New York thoroughfare.
Several city blocks had been cordoned off by police.
Buildings close to the vehicle were evacuated.
So there's no mystery.
It was an Al Qaeda panic sowing mission.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
Paralysing the city of New York for an evening is a victory for Al Qaeda.
Paralysing the city of New York with no loss of their own personnel is an even bigger victory for Al Qaeda.
Clearly President Barack Obama's administration, the media groups, the Mayor of New York Mike Bloomberg, and even the police are in multi culti denial about the attacks which Al Qaeda continues to mount against us.
And their denials are Al Qaeda's biggest victory of all.
And here's the rub.
Every news entity that even troubled to mention the second suspicious vehicle in a week to be found parked illegally in New York with gas cannisters visible in the back seat, every reporter and commentator without exception, all of the twits bar none, erroneously referred to the incident in their scanty, nay paltry, accounts as a... "false alarm."
An unnamed New York police officer supposedly told Reuters that there had never been anything to worry about.
Reuters attributed the following cretinous politically correct drivel to the NYPD: "There was no danger. It was just someone parking his car where he didn't realise he wasn't supposed to park it."
He knew where was parking it alright.
He knew precisely what he was doing.
The name of the owner of the car was not published.
This means he's a Muslim.
Or a pal of Muslims.
For Al Qaeda has learned that there are no shortage of non Muslim low lifes willing to take money to mount a panic sowing mission.
The criminals know they won't have to die.
They know they will be very unlucky if they are detained at all.
They know there will be no consequences.
So New York continues to be awash with suspicious vehicles and innocent peace loving little Mussies who just didn't realise they weren't supposed to park their gas cannister laden vehicles beneath the No Parking signs at Time Square.
Ah bless.
It could happen to anybody.
Here is the news.
Barack Obama and the appeasers of the western media are between them losing us this war.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
the monica leech bishop in
This is Archy Week at The Heelers Diaries.
Yes, all this week we're celebrating Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's ongoing attempts to hijack the Catholic Church and remake it in his own image.
Sometimes the coverage may stray onto serious issues, but mostly we'll try to keep it light.
So let's start with a joke.
Question: What do you get when you cross Archbishop Diarmuid Martin with Bono and Tony O'Reilly.
Answer: A heap of lying mendacious wealthy atheistic pop singing self worshipping talentless shite attempting to hound a generation of Bishops from office so that they can remake the Catholic Church in their own image.
of mice and muslims
Afternoon tea with the Mammy at the Deelish Cafe in the town of Athy.
MC Hamster is peeping out of my collar.
I am hoping that the other diners will not spot her as some people are not at ease sharing their cafe with a golden mouse.
Outside the sun is shining.
The Mammy and me are discoursing liberally on great affairs of culture, society and the nation.
"Is Anissa a Muslim?" enquires the Mammy out of the blue.
"Her father is," quoth me.
"What's she?" insists the Mammy.
"I'd say she's reserving her position," quoth me.
"Not that it matters," muses the Mammy.
"Of course it doesn't matter," sez me. "We could have a sort of mixed Muslim Christian wedding ceremony. Jointly conducted by the Ayatollah Beheshti and, and, and..."
"And Archbishop Diarmuid Martin," puts in the Mammy cheerfully.
I laugh less loudly than she does.
"Come to think of it," sez me, "If those were the choices, I'd prefer to have the Ayatollah Beheshti conduct the whole thing. He's more of a Christian than Diarmuid Martin anyway. At least he's never tried under false pretences to hound a generation of Bishops from office by mendaciously, maliciously and malignly labelling them concealers of child abuse."
MC Hamster is peeping out of my collar.
I am hoping that the other diners will not spot her as some people are not at ease sharing their cafe with a golden mouse.
Outside the sun is shining.
The Mammy and me are discoursing liberally on great affairs of culture, society and the nation.
"Is Anissa a Muslim?" enquires the Mammy out of the blue.
"Her father is," quoth me.
"What's she?" insists the Mammy.
"I'd say she's reserving her position," quoth me.
"Not that it matters," muses the Mammy.
"Of course it doesn't matter," sez me. "We could have a sort of mixed Muslim Christian wedding ceremony. Jointly conducted by the Ayatollah Beheshti and, and, and..."
"And Archbishop Diarmuid Martin," puts in the Mammy cheerfully.
I laugh less loudly than she does.
"Come to think of it," sez me, "If those were the choices, I'd prefer to have the Ayatollah Beheshti conduct the whole thing. He's more of a Christian than Diarmuid Martin anyway. At least he's never tried under false pretences to hound a generation of Bishops from office by mendaciously, maliciously and malignly labelling them concealers of child abuse."
archbishop diarmuid martin's infernal machine
The battle continues.
It is nothing less than a battle for the soul of the Catholic Church in Ireland.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is making his play for total power.
In order to succeed, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin must ruin a generation of Bishops and a saintly Cardinal.
He must terrorise the rest of us into silence.
But his prime target is the Bishops.
The generation of Bishops who have spent their lives in noble service to the church, the people of Ireland and the world.
The Bishops must be brought low.
Made to accept a guilt that is not theirs.
Cast out.
Humiliated.
Ruined.
So quite a few reputations must be murdered in order for the church to be hijacked.
Ninety nine people must die so that Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's diabolic vision for the church can live.
That happens to be a price Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is perfectly willing to pay.
To this end, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has constructed an infernal machine.
He has entered an alliance of anti Catholic media, senior civil servants, politicians and judicial allies, through which he is making a power grab within the hierarchy of the church.
Strictly speaking, we don't know which came first.
The chicken.
Or the egg.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
Or the judicial media conspiracy to destroy the church.
But they're working together now in a new alliance.
This new alliance is Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's infernal machine.
There is of course substantial evidence that the media have been anti Catholic for over forty years.
Certainly elements within the Irish Times and RTE were working for Communist Russia during the Cold War and did their level best to bring Ireland into the Soviet Camp.
History overtook them.
But they're still there.
And today Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is their boy.
Independent Newspapers may have come on board with the conspiracy through the agencies of other Soviet era apparatchiks.
Senior editorial figures at Independent House spent their youth waving little red books in the faces of police officers on the streets of Dublin and chanting such cheerful slogans as: "All power to the Soviets," and "Ten thousand years to Chairman Mao."
Lovely, lovely people.
But the motivations of Independent Newspapers are mired in the glutinous muck between atheistic communism and cretinous hedonism.
Independent Newpapers despises the church as much for our priests and Bishops' defence of human life, the sanctity of marriage and the dignity of sexual relations, as for any of the church's heroic historical defiances of Marxism, dictatorship, pseudo scientific atheism and One Party rule.
Independent Newspapers is different from the Irish Times and RTE in this respect.
True, Independent Newspapers is itself top heavy with Soviet era communists.
But Independent Newspapers was never married to communism like RTE and The Irish Times were.
Independent Newspapers was married just as much, even more so, to abortion culture, drugs culture, face lift culture, life in test tubes culture, euthanasia culture, Big Daddy Warbucks culture, the pleasure ethic, and every conceivable perverted cultural value inimical to human dignity.
This is why Independent Newspapers despises the faith of our fathers.
There is no other reason.
And so, either by accident or design, we find Independent Newspapers as deeply ingrained in Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's infernal machine as any of the others.
Meanwhile Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's power war against the church in Ireland unfolds before our eyes.
And it is a war he is fighting on all fronts.
It is a war fought through the malign placement of accusatory press releases seeking to incriminate the Bishops, press releases which emanate from the Archbishop's office and are dramatically splashed on the covers of the Irish Times and the Irish Independent.
It is a war fought through the dissemination of inculpatory soundbites about the Bishops on the national broadcaster RTE.
It is a war fought through an unending stream of false manipulative propaganda championed by the virulently anti Catholic media.
This is how Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has sought to force a generation of Bishops from office.
This is his play for total power.
Could I be wrong about this?
I ask you gentle readers.
Look at his allies.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's allies are the anti Catholic Irish Times, the anti Catholic Independent Newspapers, the anti Catholic RTE and the most anodyne of our anti Catholic atheistic self worshipping would be celebrities.
No Catholic priest or prelate in the history of the church has received such unremittingly positive coverage from the anti Catholic media or its shills.
I remind you that Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's brother is the atheistic pro Soviet former political editor of The anti Catholic Irish Times Seamus Martin.
I remind you that when atheistic feminist Judge Yvonne Murphy published her trumped up report retrospectively imputing purely imaginary guilt to Bishops for the purely imaginary crime of not handling child abuse cases thirty years ago the purely imaginary way Yvonne Murphy says she thinks they should be handled today, when this invidious report was published, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin in contravention of all notions of probity, truth and the rule of law, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin in repudiation of fifteen hundred years of Christian values in Ireland, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin in negation of all rational and fair minded conceptions of due process, this same Archbishop Diarmuid Martin, I say, wilfully and wantonly sought to silence the Bishops who were being so crassly maligned and grotesquely impugned, to remove from them the right to free speech, the right to explain themselves, the right to speak in their own defence, the right to answer assertions of criminality against them, the right to exonerate their good names and reputations, and the right to be heard.
I put it to you.
If there was no other evidence...
This would be enough.
These were the actions of an evil man.
This week Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has yet again upped the ante in his bid to hijack the Catholic Church in Ireland.
In a series of coordinated media statements he has attempted to demonise anyone who questions his actions.
This time not just Bishops or priests.
But an entire generation of Irish Christians.
In so doing he has sought to ruin more reputations than ever before.
Lately there had been a growing awareness among ordinary people of the conspiracy against the church.
Some people had become aware of my own assertions about Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's collusion with atheistic media groups, his outrageous bid to destroy the Bishops, his foul machinations to undermine and enslave the entire Catholic Church in Ireland, his megalomaniacal ambition to devolve total power to himself.
In spite of the anti Catholic media, it was all coming into the public domain.
And people have been developing a vocabulary to call the conspiracy what it is.
This groundswell of awareness threatens Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's whole power play within the church.
It is the one thing he can't afford
I first wrote here some months ago that the Catholic Church was being persecuted by dark forces in the media and judiciary who were allied to Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
Now Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has lifted the phrase "dark forces" from this website and attempted to turn it on those he is trying to destroy.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has through RTE, The Irish Times and Independent Newspapers, in a simultaneous burst of press releases and sound bites, claimed that "dark forces" in the Catholic church are conspiring to conceal child abuse.
In a crass preemptive strike, through yet another media blitzkrieg, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has attempted once more to blatently and invidiously label anyone who dares oppose him, as a concealer of child abuse.
He's not just labelling Bishops now.
Or the saintly Cardinal.
Or any priests who dare to speak up against his satanic manoeuvres.
He's labelling all of us.
The volunteers of the Knights of Columbanus.
Members of Parish Councils.
Any Christian anywhere.
Even James Healy, a lone blogger writing out of his Mammy's basement.
We're the dark forces.
It's a classic case of the dark force calling the kettle black.
Hey Archy.
Naughty, naughty, very naughty.
You're not going to get away with it.
It is nothing less than a battle for the soul of the Catholic Church in Ireland.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is making his play for total power.
In order to succeed, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin must ruin a generation of Bishops and a saintly Cardinal.
He must terrorise the rest of us into silence.
But his prime target is the Bishops.
The generation of Bishops who have spent their lives in noble service to the church, the people of Ireland and the world.
The Bishops must be brought low.
Made to accept a guilt that is not theirs.
Cast out.
Humiliated.
Ruined.
So quite a few reputations must be murdered in order for the church to be hijacked.
Ninety nine people must die so that Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's diabolic vision for the church can live.
That happens to be a price Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is perfectly willing to pay.
To this end, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has constructed an infernal machine.
He has entered an alliance of anti Catholic media, senior civil servants, politicians and judicial allies, through which he is making a power grab within the hierarchy of the church.
Strictly speaking, we don't know which came first.
The chicken.
Or the egg.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
Or the judicial media conspiracy to destroy the church.
But they're working together now in a new alliance.
This new alliance is Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's infernal machine.
There is of course substantial evidence that the media have been anti Catholic for over forty years.
Certainly elements within the Irish Times and RTE were working for Communist Russia during the Cold War and did their level best to bring Ireland into the Soviet Camp.
History overtook them.
But they're still there.
And today Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is their boy.
Independent Newspapers may have come on board with the conspiracy through the agencies of other Soviet era apparatchiks.
Senior editorial figures at Independent House spent their youth waving little red books in the faces of police officers on the streets of Dublin and chanting such cheerful slogans as: "All power to the Soviets," and "Ten thousand years to Chairman Mao."
Lovely, lovely people.
But the motivations of Independent Newspapers are mired in the glutinous muck between atheistic communism and cretinous hedonism.
Independent Newpapers despises the church as much for our priests and Bishops' defence of human life, the sanctity of marriage and the dignity of sexual relations, as for any of the church's heroic historical defiances of Marxism, dictatorship, pseudo scientific atheism and One Party rule.
Independent Newspapers is different from the Irish Times and RTE in this respect.
True, Independent Newspapers is itself top heavy with Soviet era communists.
But Independent Newspapers was never married to communism like RTE and The Irish Times were.
Independent Newspapers was married just as much, even more so, to abortion culture, drugs culture, face lift culture, life in test tubes culture, euthanasia culture, Big Daddy Warbucks culture, the pleasure ethic, and every conceivable perverted cultural value inimical to human dignity.
This is why Independent Newspapers despises the faith of our fathers.
There is no other reason.
And so, either by accident or design, we find Independent Newspapers as deeply ingrained in Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's infernal machine as any of the others.
Meanwhile Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's power war against the church in Ireland unfolds before our eyes.
And it is a war he is fighting on all fronts.
It is a war fought through the malign placement of accusatory press releases seeking to incriminate the Bishops, press releases which emanate from the Archbishop's office and are dramatically splashed on the covers of the Irish Times and the Irish Independent.
It is a war fought through the dissemination of inculpatory soundbites about the Bishops on the national broadcaster RTE.
It is a war fought through an unending stream of false manipulative propaganda championed by the virulently anti Catholic media.
This is how Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has sought to force a generation of Bishops from office.
This is his play for total power.
Could I be wrong about this?
I ask you gentle readers.
Look at his allies.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's allies are the anti Catholic Irish Times, the anti Catholic Independent Newspapers, the anti Catholic RTE and the most anodyne of our anti Catholic atheistic self worshipping would be celebrities.
No Catholic priest or prelate in the history of the church has received such unremittingly positive coverage from the anti Catholic media or its shills.
I remind you that Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's brother is the atheistic pro Soviet former political editor of The anti Catholic Irish Times Seamus Martin.
I remind you that when atheistic feminist Judge Yvonne Murphy published her trumped up report retrospectively imputing purely imaginary guilt to Bishops for the purely imaginary crime of not handling child abuse cases thirty years ago the purely imaginary way Yvonne Murphy says she thinks they should be handled today, when this invidious report was published, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin in contravention of all notions of probity, truth and the rule of law, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin in repudiation of fifteen hundred years of Christian values in Ireland, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin in negation of all rational and fair minded conceptions of due process, this same Archbishop Diarmuid Martin, I say, wilfully and wantonly sought to silence the Bishops who were being so crassly maligned and grotesquely impugned, to remove from them the right to free speech, the right to explain themselves, the right to speak in their own defence, the right to answer assertions of criminality against them, the right to exonerate their good names and reputations, and the right to be heard.
I put it to you.
If there was no other evidence...
This would be enough.
These were the actions of an evil man.
This week Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has yet again upped the ante in his bid to hijack the Catholic Church in Ireland.
In a series of coordinated media statements he has attempted to demonise anyone who questions his actions.
This time not just Bishops or priests.
But an entire generation of Irish Christians.
In so doing he has sought to ruin more reputations than ever before.
Lately there had been a growing awareness among ordinary people of the conspiracy against the church.
Some people had become aware of my own assertions about Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's collusion with atheistic media groups, his outrageous bid to destroy the Bishops, his foul machinations to undermine and enslave the entire Catholic Church in Ireland, his megalomaniacal ambition to devolve total power to himself.
In spite of the anti Catholic media, it was all coming into the public domain.
And people have been developing a vocabulary to call the conspiracy what it is.
This groundswell of awareness threatens Archbishop Diarmuid Martin's whole power play within the church.
It is the one thing he can't afford
I first wrote here some months ago that the Catholic Church was being persecuted by dark forces in the media and judiciary who were allied to Archbishop Diarmuid Martin.
Now Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has lifted the phrase "dark forces" from this website and attempted to turn it on those he is trying to destroy.
Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has through RTE, The Irish Times and Independent Newspapers, in a simultaneous burst of press releases and sound bites, claimed that "dark forces" in the Catholic church are conspiring to conceal child abuse.
In a crass preemptive strike, through yet another media blitzkrieg, Archbishop Diarmuid Martin has attempted once more to blatently and invidiously label anyone who dares oppose him, as a concealer of child abuse.
He's not just labelling Bishops now.
Or the saintly Cardinal.
Or any priests who dare to speak up against his satanic manoeuvres.
He's labelling all of us.
The volunteers of the Knights of Columbanus.
Members of Parish Councils.
Any Christian anywhere.
Even James Healy, a lone blogger writing out of his Mammy's basement.
We're the dark forces.
It's a classic case of the dark force calling the kettle black.
Hey Archy.
Naughty, naughty, very naughty.
You're not going to get away with it.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
rats jumping on to the sinking archbishop
AN OPEN LETTER TO ARCHBISHOP DIARMUID MARTIN
Hey Archy.
A low rent atheistic hired harridan by the name of Emer O'Kelly who works for Tony O'Reilly's virulently anti Catholic Independent Newspapers group, (current net indebtedness 2 billion dollars and counting) wrote in the Sunday Independent today: "Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is too good a man to be a Catholic."
Is she right Archy?
Are you too good for the rest of us?
Too good even for Jesus perhaps?
James Healy
Hey Archy.
A low rent atheistic hired harridan by the name of Emer O'Kelly who works for Tony O'Reilly's virulently anti Catholic Independent Newspapers group, (current net indebtedness 2 billion dollars and counting) wrote in the Sunday Independent today: "Archbishop Diarmuid Martin is too good a man to be a Catholic."
Is she right Archy?
Are you too good for the rest of us?
Too good even for Jesus perhaps?
James Healy
the ineluctible modality of heeler the peeler
Evening at the Chateau de Healy.
A scream rings out.
"Aiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
By the standards of the old Chateau, it is not a particularly remarkable scream.
Probably just a forlorn house guest getting mugged by the Diana Becerra paintings in the west wing.
Or a passing tradesman encountering the ghost of great uncle Throg in the bad room.
Or maybe a wandering nephew who's inadvertently trod on Paddy Pup's tail.
It could be any and all of these.
Nothing to get too excited about anyway.
Those of us in the television room barely pause from our contemplation of Southpark.
Screams at the chateau are normally not worth investigating.
Certainly not important enough for anyone to lift their attention from the television.
It happens to be a far less offensive episode of Southpark than usual by the way.
Only a few grotesquely cruel innuendos amid the generalised profanities.
Why it's almost charming.
Rather a good plot too.
It's the one where the children attempt to stop Stephen Spielberg from updating his old movies with new digital effects.
There's a great parody of Raiders Of The Lost Ark in the middle of it when Tweak has a bazooka and ambushes Spielberg as he's bringing his freshly reengineered movie to its premiere, and all Spielberg's henchmen have walkie talkies instead of machine guns, which is a merry reference to his redo of ET where all guns in the film were actually digitally taken out of the print and replaced with walkie talkies, but anyway in this parody of Raiders Tweak has the drop on Spielberg and his goons, and Tweak says "I don't care about the movie Spielberg, you can keep it, I just want my friends back," and Cartman gives an emotional "aw," and then Tweak says "except Cartman, you can keep him," and Cartman splutters "hey," and Spielberg challenges Tweak to open fire just like Belloc did in Raiders, and tells him "you want to see this movie as much as I do, go ahead blow it up," and Spielberg's own goons can't believe he's going to let Tweak blow up the movie, which by the way is contained in a wooden chest remarkably similar to the Ark Of The Covenant's chest in Raiders, and they lunge towards the chest, and Spielberg grabs a walkie talkie and clicks off the safety catch and shouts something in Hollywood German, just like Belloc did in Raiders, he shouts "zuruck" actually which is German for "get back," not many people know that, and I'm nearly sure the makers of Southpark didn't, but they threw it in anyway, and Tweak can't bring himself to blow up the chest and he's captured by the men with the walkie talkies which make kerchick sounds like machine guns as the goons click of the safety catches, and clearly I need to get out more.
Back to the chateau.
There's just been a scream.
The shrill timbre of the scream suggests it may in fact belong to my Yogic sister Marie.
So it proves.
Presently Marie enters the television room.
It is a dramatic entrance.
Marie is not quite in high dudgeon.
But her dudgeon is definitely elevated.
I'd say it's a Code Yellow.
"James!" she spits.
She doesn't spit it in a very friendly way.
She spits it like an Old Testament prophet might have spat "Beelzebub."
Rum one, eh?
I thought people who did Yoga were supposed to be perpetually calm.
I look up reluctantly from Southpark.
I'm not too worried.
It takes a lot to worry me these days.
More precisely, it takes a lot to worry me since last night's production of my play Poets In Paradise.
Since last night's production of my play, I don't think I'll ever worry about anything again.
(Cue another long discursive reminiscence. - Ed note.)
I was on stage portraying WB Yeats in the show.
And on stage I discovered that the soprano singing sensation known to scholars of my work as The Brezzer had made an executive decision to liaise with the sound man, introducing a backing track for three songs that I have compelled her to sing unaccompanied in various productions of this very play for the last ten years.
If you were among the seventy strong audience at last night's performance, you might have noticed WB Yeats turning a lighter shade of green every time the Brezzer's backing track kicked in.
It is a night that will live in infamy.
From now on we shall refer to it as the night of the long piano solos.
It was also to be a night of some spiritual growth for the mighty Heelers.
Suffering is good for the soul.
And the suffering didn't end with the backing tracks.
There were other changes which the Brezzer had introduced without my permission.
She and her pal Eilis Drillbits had left little candles all over the stage to evoke their idea of heaven.
My idea had been for the actors to evoke heaven through their acting.
The candles meant my much vaunted fade to black at the end would be a fade to a dimly lit room full of bloody ephin candles.
And there was more.
The Brezzer in the role of an angel had donned a rather more eye catching dress than the one I normally permitted her.
This time she wore a huge white taffetta affair with a train down the back.
The train was longer than the one Lady Diana had on her wedding dress.
My beautiful play was thus transformed from a gentle nostalgic imaginative portrayal of famous Irish writers meeting to share a few drinks after death, into something completely different.
It became a tense urban drama about an angel wearing a huge dress and wondering how to manipulate it in a confined space without catching fire from the candles she'd insisted on scattering about the place.
Sometimes gentle travellers of the internet, it almost seems God put me on this earth to suffer.
It's hardly worth mentioning that there was even more for me to deal with on the big night.
Not just the Brezzer.
For lo!
The Master of Ceremonies was one John Coleman.
Yes him.
The right ham of the devil.
Ten years ago he had played WB Yeats in the first ever production of my play.
Tonight as MC he launched into a witty put down of the noble Heelers which seemed to please the assembled oikes no end.
His put down culminated with the assertion that he had only lost his part in the play because I was afraid he was a better actor than me.
To laughter and some immoderate clapping from the cheap seats (ie all of them) Colers claimed: "They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Well I say to you, hell hath no fury like James Healy upstaged."
Ah God will punish him.
Hopefully.
But I digress.
Return with me patient reader, to the chateau once more.
Marie is staring down at me.
Her stare is like the stare from central casting.
Basilisks wouldn't get a look in with her.
(Basilisk Fawlty and those sort of guys.)All I want to do is watch the end of Southpark.
"Did you leave that bloody hamster in the bath?" snarled the sister viciously.
"I did," sez me.
"She nearly gave me a heart attack," frothed the sister.
Ireland's greatest living poet nodded mollifyingly.
"She's gotten a bit old," I explained. "She can't fall or hurt herself in the bath. You know, throughout my whole childhood, I've never had a hamster that lived two years before."
My brother Tom looked up sharply from the television.
"They'd all have lived two years," he pronounced insinuatingly."Except you kept throwing them out when they tried to hibernate."
I waved him to silence and continued my explanation to Marie.
"You see it's sometimes hard for Hammy to negotiate her cage now," I said. "So I like to put her in the bath with a towel to snuggle in. It's a nice level surface and she can run around without hurting herself, and then she can have a sleep if she wants it."
The Mammy stirred in her armchair.
"You put towels in with her?" she cried. "Does she do her poohs and pees in the towels?"
"Hardly ever," I murmured mollifyingly.
I looked back to Marie.
She was no longer there.
She had heard enough and had slipped quietly away.
Vanished on a voodoo wind.
Gone to seek a bath somewhere safer.
Somewhere cleaner.
Somewhere saner.
A scream rings out.
"Aiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeee!"
By the standards of the old Chateau, it is not a particularly remarkable scream.
Probably just a forlorn house guest getting mugged by the Diana Becerra paintings in the west wing.
Or a passing tradesman encountering the ghost of great uncle Throg in the bad room.
Or maybe a wandering nephew who's inadvertently trod on Paddy Pup's tail.
It could be any and all of these.
Nothing to get too excited about anyway.
Those of us in the television room barely pause from our contemplation of Southpark.
Screams at the chateau are normally not worth investigating.
Certainly not important enough for anyone to lift their attention from the television.
It happens to be a far less offensive episode of Southpark than usual by the way.
Only a few grotesquely cruel innuendos amid the generalised profanities.
Why it's almost charming.
Rather a good plot too.
It's the one where the children attempt to stop Stephen Spielberg from updating his old movies with new digital effects.
There's a great parody of Raiders Of The Lost Ark in the middle of it when Tweak has a bazooka and ambushes Spielberg as he's bringing his freshly reengineered movie to its premiere, and all Spielberg's henchmen have walkie talkies instead of machine guns, which is a merry reference to his redo of ET where all guns in the film were actually digitally taken out of the print and replaced with walkie talkies, but anyway in this parody of Raiders Tweak has the drop on Spielberg and his goons, and Tweak says "I don't care about the movie Spielberg, you can keep it, I just want my friends back," and Cartman gives an emotional "aw," and then Tweak says "except Cartman, you can keep him," and Cartman splutters "hey," and Spielberg challenges Tweak to open fire just like Belloc did in Raiders, and tells him "you want to see this movie as much as I do, go ahead blow it up," and Spielberg's own goons can't believe he's going to let Tweak blow up the movie, which by the way is contained in a wooden chest remarkably similar to the Ark Of The Covenant's chest in Raiders, and they lunge towards the chest, and Spielberg grabs a walkie talkie and clicks off the safety catch and shouts something in Hollywood German, just like Belloc did in Raiders, he shouts "zuruck" actually which is German for "get back," not many people know that, and I'm nearly sure the makers of Southpark didn't, but they threw it in anyway, and Tweak can't bring himself to blow up the chest and he's captured by the men with the walkie talkies which make kerchick sounds like machine guns as the goons click of the safety catches, and clearly I need to get out more.
Back to the chateau.
There's just been a scream.
The shrill timbre of the scream suggests it may in fact belong to my Yogic sister Marie.
So it proves.
Presently Marie enters the television room.
It is a dramatic entrance.
Marie is not quite in high dudgeon.
But her dudgeon is definitely elevated.
I'd say it's a Code Yellow.
"James!" she spits.
She doesn't spit it in a very friendly way.
She spits it like an Old Testament prophet might have spat "Beelzebub."
Rum one, eh?
I thought people who did Yoga were supposed to be perpetually calm.
I look up reluctantly from Southpark.
I'm not too worried.
It takes a lot to worry me these days.
More precisely, it takes a lot to worry me since last night's production of my play Poets In Paradise.
Since last night's production of my play, I don't think I'll ever worry about anything again.
(Cue another long discursive reminiscence. - Ed note.)
I was on stage portraying WB Yeats in the show.
And on stage I discovered that the soprano singing sensation known to scholars of my work as The Brezzer had made an executive decision to liaise with the sound man, introducing a backing track for three songs that I have compelled her to sing unaccompanied in various productions of this very play for the last ten years.
If you were among the seventy strong audience at last night's performance, you might have noticed WB Yeats turning a lighter shade of green every time the Brezzer's backing track kicked in.
It is a night that will live in infamy.
From now on we shall refer to it as the night of the long piano solos.
It was also to be a night of some spiritual growth for the mighty Heelers.
Suffering is good for the soul.
And the suffering didn't end with the backing tracks.
There were other changes which the Brezzer had introduced without my permission.
She and her pal Eilis Drillbits had left little candles all over the stage to evoke their idea of heaven.
My idea had been for the actors to evoke heaven through their acting.
The candles meant my much vaunted fade to black at the end would be a fade to a dimly lit room full of bloody ephin candles.
And there was more.
The Brezzer in the role of an angel had donned a rather more eye catching dress than the one I normally permitted her.
This time she wore a huge white taffetta affair with a train down the back.
The train was longer than the one Lady Diana had on her wedding dress.
My beautiful play was thus transformed from a gentle nostalgic imaginative portrayal of famous Irish writers meeting to share a few drinks after death, into something completely different.
It became a tense urban drama about an angel wearing a huge dress and wondering how to manipulate it in a confined space without catching fire from the candles she'd insisted on scattering about the place.
Sometimes gentle travellers of the internet, it almost seems God put me on this earth to suffer.
It's hardly worth mentioning that there was even more for me to deal with on the big night.
Not just the Brezzer.
For lo!
The Master of Ceremonies was one John Coleman.
Yes him.
The right ham of the devil.
Ten years ago he had played WB Yeats in the first ever production of my play.
Tonight as MC he launched into a witty put down of the noble Heelers which seemed to please the assembled oikes no end.
His put down culminated with the assertion that he had only lost his part in the play because I was afraid he was a better actor than me.
To laughter and some immoderate clapping from the cheap seats (ie all of them) Colers claimed: "They say hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. Well I say to you, hell hath no fury like James Healy upstaged."
Ah God will punish him.
Hopefully.
But I digress.
Return with me patient reader, to the chateau once more.
Marie is staring down at me.
Her stare is like the stare from central casting.
Basilisks wouldn't get a look in with her.
(Basilisk Fawlty and those sort of guys.)All I want to do is watch the end of Southpark.
"Did you leave that bloody hamster in the bath?" snarled the sister viciously.
"I did," sez me.
"She nearly gave me a heart attack," frothed the sister.
Ireland's greatest living poet nodded mollifyingly.
"She's gotten a bit old," I explained. "She can't fall or hurt herself in the bath. You know, throughout my whole childhood, I've never had a hamster that lived two years before."
My brother Tom looked up sharply from the television.
"They'd all have lived two years," he pronounced insinuatingly."Except you kept throwing them out when they tried to hibernate."
I waved him to silence and continued my explanation to Marie.
"You see it's sometimes hard for Hammy to negotiate her cage now," I said. "So I like to put her in the bath with a towel to snuggle in. It's a nice level surface and she can run around without hurting herself, and then she can have a sleep if she wants it."
The Mammy stirred in her armchair.
"You put towels in with her?" she cried. "Does she do her poohs and pees in the towels?"
"Hardly ever," I murmured mollifyingly.
I looked back to Marie.
She was no longer there.
She had heard enough and had slipped quietly away.
Vanished on a voodoo wind.
Gone to seek a bath somewhere safer.
Somewhere cleaner.
Somewhere saner.