The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, August 11, 2012

box watching

Drowsing in front of the sexevision.
One of the music channels is playing.
David Bowie comes on with a new version of his old hit.
As the lyrics reach me, I perk up.
David Bowie is singing:

"Ashes to ashes
I'm a flunky
You know Cian O'Connor's horse is a junkie
Strung out in outer space
 Singing oh oh ohhhhhhhhh
My Mama says
To get things rightly
You'd better not mess
With Tony O'Reilly.
My Mama says
When things get unsightly
You just gotta call
Tony O'Reilly"

I've never much bought into the legend of David Bowie. But he does have a sort of louche genius. And this song was positively daring.

olympic games news flash

Cian O'Connor has announced that he will ride Michelle Smith in future international equestrian events.

Friday, August 10, 2012

triumph of a man called drugs i mean horse

Cian O'Connor has won a bronze medal in the Olympic games.
His placement on the Irish team was carried out surreptitiously.
That is to say no one knew he was on the team and there was scant newspaper reportage of his presence with the Irish squad prior to the Olympics.
By scant I mean none.
Apparently he had been named as some sort of Second Substitute Once Removed at a backroom meeting of the Irish Equestrian organisation Horse Sport Ireland which is headed up by his corporate sponsor Tony O'Reilly's wife Miss Stavros Niarchos. (Christina Goulandris surely? - Ed note)
I kid you not.
So Horse Sport Ireland (owned by Tony O'Reilly's wife) and Independent Newspapers (owned by Tony O'Reilly) colluded to keep the presence of Cian O'Connor (Tony O'Reilly's protege) on the Irish equestrian team at the Olympics, secret from the general public until ye aforementioned Olympics were well underway.
Hilarious no.
The reason for all the secrecy about Cian O'Connor's disgraceful surreptitious sideways nomination to the Irish Olympic Squad is that in the past Cian O'Connor's horses have had a distinct propensity for testing positive for illegal drugs during international competitions.
Indeed this is not the first Olympic medal that Cian O'Connor's drug addict horses have won.
Eight years ago he won a gold medal at the Athens Olympics which was then stripped from him after his horse tested positive for various narcotic substances.
As per usual Cian O'Connor claimed to have had no knowledge that his horses were using illegal drugs.
"Not my fault Guv if my horse is a Junkie," he cried. "Not my fault if my horse slips off at night into the inner city to meet his candy man. Not my fault if my horse keeps showing up for international competitions high as a kite. Am I my horse's keeper?"
And so on.
The finding of banned substances in Cian O'Connor's horses at the Olympics and elsewhere was only the beginning of a series of extraordinary events.
First a drug sample from Cian O'Connor's horse was hijacked when a motorcycle courier was supposedly intercepted by unidentified bandits.
Then records of a previous drug infraction relating to another of Cian O'Connor's horses were stolen in a supposed burglary at the offices of Horse Sport Ireland the official oversight body for the equestrian industry in Ireland. (Yes the one headed up by Tony O'Reilly's wife Cristina Goulandris. Yawn.)
Then Jennifer Kurten, in my opinion an honest equestrian competitor, announced that she would not accept a place on any Irish team which featured Cian O'Connor.
A dope sample was immediately planted in one of her horses by a person or persons unknown.
I mean, my assessment of the facts is that the dope sample was planted there.
I am suggesting that the likelihood that she was guilty of doping is negligible, and that the coincidence of a doping allegation emerging against her immediately after her comments re Cian O'Connor is egregious and foul and stinks to high heaven.
Actually it stinks to high O'Reillys.
It was a thoroughly ridiculous thoroughly malign attempt to ruin the reputation of a someone whose only crime was to put her head above the parapet and call for a modicum of integrity in the selection of Irish Olympic teams.
Backwards boggles the mind.
There are very few people in Ireland with the organisational capacity to set up the framing of Jennifer Kurten.
Cian O'Connor, as already mentioned in a couple of my more oblique asides (you may hardly have noticed them) is a protege of media baron Tony O'Reilly who, among other things, buys his horses for him.
Tony O'Reilly is the proprietor of the bankrupt anti Catholic newspaper group which styles itself Independent Newspapers.
(Blah, blah, blah, Heelers. - Ed note)
The dogs on the street thought that Tony O'Reilly's connections had arranged for the theft of Cian O'Connor's various horses' various positive drug samples via various staged courier hijackings and various staged break ins at the premises of Horse Sport Ireland.
I personally entertain no doubts that Jennifer Kurten was framed.
We should additionally clarify (or repeat) that Tony O'Reilly's wife Miss Cristina Goulandris is head of the Irish equestrian body which styles itself Horse Sport Ireland, the same organisation which inserted Cian O'Connor on this year's Olympic squad as a Second Substitute Once Removed Throw A Cat Over Your Shoulder In A Graveyard At Midnight Shouting Warts Go Away And You'll End Up On The Irish Team.
You heard me.
Tony O'Reilly's Greek trophy wife is head of Horse Sport Ireland.
(We heard you the first time. - Ed note)
Christina Goulandris in charge of Irish equestrianism.
I ask you.
You might as well let Don King run the show, although I'm reliably informed that Cristina Goulandris has never yet stomped someone to death as Don King did to Sam Garret.
So Cian O'Connor has another Olympic medal.
I wonder how long they'll let him keep this one.
And his horses still haven't faced charges over any of the drugs they've been snorting.
Ho hum.
It's not exactly National Velvet, is it.

Thursday, August 09, 2012

its a muslim muslim muslim muslim world

We are in the first years of a European wide civil war.
Since the year 2000, the war has gathered pace.
You could be forgiven for thinking Europe had already surrendered to its Muslim would be conquerors.
In the past decade Muslims have: blown up trains and buses in England; attempted to blow up Glasgow airport; attempted repeatedly to bomb British cities; torched French cities; stabbed the mayor of Paris; murdered French soldiers at ATM machines; filmed themselves shooting dead three little Jewish schoolgirls in Toulouse; sued the French State for not capturing alive the Muslim who slaughtered the little Jewish schoolgirls and the French soldiers at the ATM machines; detached Kosovo from Serbia; insisted on retaining Northern Cyprus which they had already detached from Cyprus; attempted to poison Rome's water supply; beat an Irish teenager to death on Grafton Street Dublin with a baseball bat and evaded what passes for Irish justice by buying an Irish judge; blew up the Madrid metro; blew up apartment buildings in Madrid; executed Dutch film director Theo Van Gogh in the streets of the Netherlands; executed Pym Fortyn, the Dutch Prime Minister in waiting, in the streets of the Netherlands; operated child abuse networks solely targeting white children in the UK; knocked over sky scrapers in New York; blown up planes all over the world whenever the mood took them; bombed Christian churches across Africa; murdered 150 Russian schoolchildren at Beslan; blew up the Moscow Saint Petersburg Express train; continued all out Jihad war against China and India; initiated plans to bomb the Canadian parliament and behead the Canadian Prime Minister; successfully shot up the Indian parliament; shot dead in the streets 187 people in Bombay; attempted to develop nuclear weapons to destroy the State of Israel; successfully developed nuclear weapons in Pakistan while whining to the world that they didn't have enough money to build flood defences against Pakistan's annual moonsoon.
All this in the past ten years.
All this and much much more.
And what has been the response of Europe's ruling pseudo elites?
Not to limit Muslim immigration.
But to expand it exponentially.
Meanwhile the Muslims continue to probe our defences, buy up our Judges and politicians, and establish the bridge head for their ultimate enslavement of what is for them a new continent.
Here is the news.
The Muslims will either rule us or be defeated.
There is no other outcome on the table.
Defeat for the Muslims will mean we send them home to the countries they have already enslaved for fifteen centuries.
Send them home to Allah.
And to the hell on earth that Muslims create wherever they seize control of a country.
Send them home.
All of them.

Wednesday, August 08, 2012


Watching the remake of Lionel Bart's infamously cute musical adoptation of Charles Dickens' novel Oliver.
I rather like the new version.
Interesting decision to cast kleptocratic former Irish Prime Minister Albert  Reynolds in the lead role as the gentle faced orphan Oliver.
The best bit is when Oliver is strolling through 19th century London as the sun is coming up.
He sings to still sleeping streets:
"Who will buy
My lovely passports
Who will buy
Irish passports from me
Who will buy my lovely passports
They cost a million dollars for my pet food factory"
The rhymes are twee but it's catchy.
And as Oliver sings, the street is suddenly filled with swirling Muslims, strapping on their suicide belts, leaving suitcase bombs beside the tube stations, torching churches all over Africa along with the suburbs of French cities, trying to poison Rome's water supply, bombing the Madrid metro, sloshing acid into passing children's faces who have committed the crime of going to school, and videoing themselves shooting dead three little Jewish schoolgirls in France just for the hell of it.
Hell being the operative word.
There's a nice little cameo as they execute Dutch film director Theo Van Gogh and stab the mayor of Paris right in front of Oliver, at the same time detonating explosives in buses, trains, plains and automobiles across Europe while no one else seems to notice.
The Muslims dance out of the shadows and alleyways from every direction, singing lustily as they explode:
"We will buy
Your lovely passports
We need citizenship
To advance the Jihad
We will buy
Your lovely passports
Allah U Akbar
And a kick in the nads."
Again not great rhymes but you have to admire a film company that would dare to tell the truth about these things.

Tuesday, August 07, 2012


Maeve Binchy is dead.
She now knows for sure whether her lifelong assertion that there is no God is true or not.
Of course after a lifetime proselytising in the anti Catholic Irish Times and elsewhere against the Catholic Church and in favour of abortion, contraception, divorce and anything else atheistic humanists cared to devise in their war against humanity, after a lifetime of this sort of atheistic Nazism, she was of course, of course, of course, buried with full honours in a plush fermourless almost limitlessly piously hypocritical faux Catholic Church ceremony in the Church of the Holy Liberal Atheistic Abortionists, Dalkey, Dublin, a ceremony conducted by tame defeated cowed priests before an audience of Maeve Binchy's closest most atheistic abortionist friends, tame priests who should be ashamed of themselves for lending their Church and our Religion to provide a backdrop for what amounted to a day out for the anti Catholic Irish Times, the anti Catholic RTE State monopoly broadcaster, the anti Catholic Independent Newspapers' management, staff and connections, the anodyne atheistic pseudo elites who have delivered Ireland, lock, stock and two smoking barrels, via their vitiation of Christian values, their championing of Muslim immigration, their repudiation of the rule of law per a Judiciary packed with Communists, Free Masons, and other lesser breeds without the law, delivered us I say, signed sealed and delivered, right to the gates of hell.
Maeve Binchy is dead.
It was a blessed release.
For all of us.

Sunday, August 05, 2012

the donkeys

David Cameron Prime Minister of Great Britain met with Vladimir Putin President of Russia before the start of the Olympics.
President Putin, if you believe my analysis, has been directly responsible for the assassination of the President of Poland along with a hundred leading Polish politicians, in a staged air crash. The crash was staged in the sense that Mr Putin shot the plane down. Mr Putin has also been responsible for the installation in Poland of a Russian puppet as President through a gerrymandered election. He has also been responsible for the attempted poisoning of a Presidential candidate in Ukraine. He has also been responsible for the gerrymandering of Ukraine's most recent election and the installation of a Russian puppet as President there. He has also been responsible for the arrest and detention on trumped up charges in Ukraine of Ukraine's current legitimate President Julia Timoshenko. He has also been responsible for shipping nuclear reactors to the Iranians. He has also been responsible for shipping high ordinance weaponry to the Assad dictatorship in Syria. He has also been responsible in collusion with the Assad dictatorship in Syria of sequestering Saddam Hussein's weapons of mass destruction from Iraq to Syria as part of an operation to embarrass the Americans and invalidate the American liberation of Iraq from Saddam Hussein's murderocracy. He has also been responsible for the barbarous assassination in Britain of a Russian former special services soldier. Mr Putin's assassins used nuclear poisons to kill their victim. He has also been responsible for ordering nuclear bombers to begin fly overs of Western Europe again, something that hasn't been done since the end of the Cold War. He has also been responsible for the forcible reincorporation of regions of the Republic of Georgia into Russia. He has also been responsible for the assassination of leading Georgian politicians. He has also been responsible for sponsoring separatist terror wars in Moldova and in Armenia. He has also been responsible for sending Yevgenia Tarasova to seduce me.
When David Cameron met Mr Putin a few days ago, David Cameron said the following: "We are very concerned about the human rights implications of the trial in Moscow of a girl pop group called Pussy Riot."
That's it.
That's all he said.
The unknown pop group styling itself Pussy Riot consists of four unknown girls who recently shouted anti Putin slogans in a church in order to make themselves less well unknown.
I weep for my generation.