The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, August 29, 2015

in re attempts to discredit hillary clinton

I disagree with the current attempts to discredit Hillary Clinton regarding her procedural handling of communications to her office while a senior government official of the United States of America.
I disagree with Hillary Clinton herself about her advocacy of abortion as an acceptable normative medical procedure.
I do not wish to see Hillary Clinton's career derailed or sabotaged by commentators, competitors or simply jeerers, using legalistic fripperies to discredit her.
I do not wish to win any argument with Hillary Clinton about her use of email.
The only argument I want to win with Hillary Clinton, for her sake and mine and the sake of  the human race, is about the sanctity of life.
Thank you for your time.

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

subtle incongruencies of existence

A letter from the Bridge magazine inviting me to attend a workshop for contributors which will be hosted by broadcaster/author/journalist/poet Brian Byrne and which aims to impart to its participants the ability to write interestingly.
Nymph in thy orisons be all my sins remembered.
Bloody Trapman.
He yet lives.
Dammit all.
It is better to be that which we destroy than by destruction dwell in doubtful joy.
As Macbeth said to the bishop.
Well you know what I mean.
I ask you bold readers.
Imagine inviting me to a workshop for writers being delivered by Brian Byrne.
It's the final insult.
Whom the gods wish to destroy they first make mad.

Tuesday, August 25, 2015

the newly discovered original lost alternative ending to murders in the rue dole yer

The story so far: Heelers is racing across town to try and stop a supernatural assassin who is intent on wiping out the employees of the The Irish Times newspaper. James has never been a fan of the atheistic abortionist contraceptivist life in test tubes Bolshevick pro IRA anti American anti Israel anti Catholic newspaper, so the rescue mission presents something of a moral dilemma for him,  But his belle nature reasserts and he undertakes the task with gusto. Outside the Irish Times building he has an encounter with pure evil in the form of the assassin himself. Now read on...

i quickened my pace the criminals of dublin tend to congregate after dark it lends a certain atmosphere to their work
i realised if i quickened my pace any more i would be running flat out thankfully the irish times building lay directly ahead of me a beacon of constancy in a world out of control
a sigh of relief escaped my lips
then he appeared
right between me and the office building ahead
the aura of evil was palpable although i had no intention of palping it
i drew my gun
he laughed
the futility hit me
i lowered my hands to my side
he emanated malevolence
what use to resist
what can a man do against phantoms
what can a gun do against this
i spoke a single sentence of surrender
it had two distinct clauses that is a subject and a predicate two verbs the second of which was an imperative an abstract noun some personal pronouns and a preposition indicatiing location as prepositions generally do
they're in there i told the ghost give em hell

saints alive

Lutheran Pastor Richard Wurmbrand: "My captors had left no place in their hearts for God. I resolved to leave no place in my heart for satan."

Monday, August 24, 2015


Watching Iron Man on the sexevision.
Robert Downey Junior is quite good as Stark the businessman who becomes a superhero by donning a robot exo skeleton he's invented for the purpose.
By the way he designs the robo suit while being held hostage by Islamists who think he's designing a missile system for them.
I kid you not.
The best bit is when he and his Jewish friend (also a captive) finish the suit and Robert Downey turns on their Islamist captors, and the Jewish friend gets wounded, and Robert Downey says: "Come on let's get out of here."
And the Jewish guy says: "I'm not going with you."
And Robert Downey says: "Come on. We both escape. That's the plan. We gotta stick to the plan."
And the Jewish guy says: "This was always the plan Stark. I was always going to shamelessly libel journalists from the Independent Newspaper group so that they'd read my blog. And then when I knew they were reading it, I'd give them a vocabulary to know that the IRA was operating in Ireland as a people trafficking drug dealing mafia in alliance with Al Qaeda and all the other skang mafias. And then the Indo journalists would start to write about the IRA as a mafia. And then the game would end because the Irish people have never yet let scum rule them."
And Robert Downey Junior says: "Oh."