The Heelers Diaries

the fantasy world of ireland's greatest living poet

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Location: Kilcullen (Phone 087 7790766), County Kildare, Ireland

Saturday, December 31, 2011


Friday, December 30, 2011

special guest blogger albert einstein

Being a lover of freedom, when the Nazi revolution came to Germany, I looked to the universities to defend it, knowing that they had always boasted of their devotion to the cause of truth; but, no, the universities immediately were silenced. Then I looked to the editors of the newspapers, whose flaming editorials in days gone by had proclaimed their love of freedom; but they like the universities, were silenced in a few short weeks. Only the Catholic Church stood squarely across the path of Hitler's campaign for suppressing the truth. I never had any special interest in the Church before, but now I feel a great affection and admiration because the Church alone has had the courage and persistence to stand for intellectual truth and moral freedom. I am forced to confess that what I once despised, I now praise unreservedly.
- Albert Einstein (Speaking in Time Magazine, 23rd December 1940)

Thursday, December 29, 2011

on first looking into lukwesa burak's new haircut

Say it ain't so, Lukwesa, say it ain't so.

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

tempered steel

Coffee with Drusilla.
Her and her regal features and fake classy British accent.
We break bread together about once every five years.
It's too often.
I have no idea what I'm playing at by meeting her.
Today she is Catholic Churching out of her to beat the band.
That is to say, she is accusing the Catholic Church of all manner of crimes.
Obviously she's spent the five year period since our last meeting meditating on the Gospel according to the Irish Times.
Her memories of me seem to have dimmed with the years also.
For she cannot believe I might dare to speak in opposition to the nonsense she is spouting.
Presently I grow weary of hearing this gulpen accusing our ancient and beautiful religion of unspeakable crimes drawn from the imagination of the liberal atheists currently seeking to our enslave our country to abortion culture, atheistic hedonism, the pleasure ethic, drugs and a new religion which involves the idolotrous worship of one Tony O'Reilly.
(Two Tony O'Reillys would be an extravagance. - Ed note.)
"What do you do for a living?" I ask Drusilla as she pauses for a muffin.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean what are you working at?"
"James, you know what I work at."
"I want to hear you say it."
"F--k off James."
She pronounces it focque.
"You're a bank manager, aren't you Drusilla?"
"What's your point?"
"Well you accuse the Catholic Church of all sorts of crimes. And you pretend to care about sex abuse. But you ignore the 99.99 percent of sex abuse cases, the most serious ones, which arise outside the Church as part of the tidal wave of sex abuse engulfing every segment of our society."
"I wonder where you got those statistics, and I still don't see your point."
"But you're a bank manager Drusilla. Do you not see the irony here?"
"Well whatever number of child abuse crimes you can falsely construe to lay at the door of the Catholic Church, perhaps we can agree that those crimes surely pale, at least in numerical comparison, when placed alongside the number of children you have criminally bankrupted through your fake job at the Irish Bank Of Corruption And Thievery Ltd. I mean you and your bank and the other banks have bankrupted every child in the country. And having bankrupted every child in the country, that wasn't enough for you. You've gone on, and bankrupted every child for the next fifty generations. Just by giving yourselves and your gangster friends loans you could never repay, paying yourselves salaries you never earned, and then compelling the citizenry to foot the bill when the reality check kicked in. You've thrown the Irish nation lock stock and one hundred billion smoking barrels, permanently into the Third World. Some of us think what you people have done in the banks ranks right up there with child abuse. Maybe it's worse. There's certainly infinitely more victims. And those victims will live with the consequences of what you people did infinitely longer, ie for the entire foreseeable future. And you and your banking friends did it just so you could all drive around in silly shiney new cars that you never earned the money to pay for. And so that you could live in silly shiney houses bigger than your neighbours. And so that you could take silly shiney holidays five times a year and style yourselves professionals. Plus your sick leave. And your maternity leave. It's all a con, isn't  it Drusilla? You and your generation's jobs, your lifestyles, your atheistic values, and your attempted criminalisation of the Catholic Church. It's all a balls. Hoo baby. All your money comes from money borrowed by the Irish government to keep your fake Banks afloat on fake rationales and fake work practices. You've got no customers and you've got no business model beyond forcing ordinary citizens to pay your every gambling debt. You people should be in jail. Instead you have the gall to designate yourselves judges over previous generations of Irish people. People who actually worked for a living, aborted no one, didn't borrow the unborn generations into unpayable debts, and never surrendered their children to the whoredom culture you so cherish. You're standing in judgement on them and on the faith that sustained them through twenty centuries as a nation. Bloody hell."
A distant look came over Drusilla's finely wrought features.
"Go f--k yourself James," she said with much more conviction than before.
"How did you get your job in the bank?" I pressed her.
"Why do you ask?"
"I just want to know."
"I've worked for fifteen years to get where I am."
"Ah you didn't really. Not for fifteen. You spent most of it on maternity leave and sick leave and doing part time work, didn't you?"
"F--k off James." Stronger.
"But what I was asking was how you got into the bank in the first place. And I know how. Your Daddy rang up the bank one fine day and said: Give my daughter a job. That's how it happened, isn't it? Now for some of us who refuse to use pull to get jobs, that sort of behaviour amounts to an egregious abuse. Maybe not quite up there with child abuse. But you know. Fairly serious. In the societal sense. I mean for the hyndreds of thousands of people going to job interviews who know in their heart of hearts that the job is already gone to someone whose Daddy rang up that morning and got it for them. It's abuse alright. And the consequences can be as serious as child abuse. Oh they can. If there are enough people getting jobs the way you got yours, and if we're not all Catholic believers, then there's no longer any reason for us to resist the temptations of communism and shoot you people, you who have condemned us to live as farm animals. The Catholicism you despise Drusilla, is all that protects you and your ilk from conflagration. Ironic, eh?"
"F--k off James." Real vehemence now.
She had stood up and was disappearing due west at a rate of knots.
I called after her.
Heads turned in the cafe.
"Hey. Hey you. Yeah you. There she goes. The great arbiter of wrongdoing. You've bankrupted the nation. You've cheated a generation out of a decent livelihood. You've sentenced the unborn millions to live their lives as serfs in an impoverished hell hole. And worst of all you've alienated the poetic, noble, soulful, Irish people from our beautiful, ancient and true religion. You've alienated young people from the one truth that could have saved them from the inferno you have unleashed. And you tell me to f--k off? You... you focque off."

the monica leech laugh in

Snow White is in bed feeling a corrupt kleptocratic Fianna Fail government minister's bawls. So the Fianna Fail government minister gives her three hundred grand of public money to design an unnecessary website, the contract for which will never be opened to public tender and the pages of which no member of the public will ever visit.

statue in the cold night air

while liberal atheists watched their flocks at night

Last night CNN ran a report on the psychotic devil worshiping tortures and violations which had been habitually inflicted by Colonel Gadaffi and his family on the Gadaffis' personal servants and staff prior to the recent Western backed removal of the Gadaffi dictatorship. The story was the first ever qualitative piece of journalism in the entire history of CNN. Of course CNN ran the story only to bolster the Libyan intervention policy of President Barak Obama. CNN ignored and continues to ignore similar and worse devil worshiping tortures which were routinely inflicted by Saddam Hussein's family in Iraq and by Al Qaeda in Afghanistan prior to the American liberation of those countries. Never a whiff of retrospective analysis there, eh CNN? I suppose you couldn't afford the risk that you might have to attribute colateral credit to the policies of President Bush. One's gorra larf.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

let us speak of grenadiers

"Do you admit that the Catholic Church has ever done anything wrong?" enquired Rowena over tiffin.
Of all the variegated pseuds and trendies who occasionally deign to discuss such things with me, she is the most respectful of my own position.
She will ask.
She will listen.
And she will give it to me with both barrels.
I respect her more than any other who has debated these matters with me.
My respect is realistic and without a trace of sentiment.
As is hers for me.
She is a driven, career woman atheist by the way, but as I'm hinting, not without kindness.
In her past life she worked as an accountant for one of Ireland's most notorious white collar criminals Denis O'Brien.
He's the one who a decade ago bribed a corrupt Fine Gael government Minister called Michael Lowry to give him a mobile phone licence for a fee of five million dollars when the licence should have cost him a thousand million.
Only the nation was getting impoverished.
So why worry.
Rowena used to help Denis O'Brien count the billion dollars he got when he finally sold the mobile phone licence himself, oh at least a full five minutes after he corruptly acquired it from the corrupt Lowry.
And today she's asking me with a pitying look in her eye, if I accept that the Catholic Church has ever done anything wrong.
Presumably she means with regard to the Church's handling of sex abuse cases.
Ah yes.
All the young conformist thieves are much agitated by the Church's handling of the tiny minority of sex abuse cases which have arisen within the Church while the rest of the country is being engulfed with a tidal wave of child murder, child rape, child abuse and child sacrifice to satan, that none of them so much as notice never mind deign to question.
As they stoop down from Mount Olympus to ask me with a pitying look in their eyes if I accept the Catholic Church has ever done anything wrong.
"I accept the Church has done four things wrong," I answer warmly. "Firstly the Church, ie the Bishops, listened to their lawyers. Yes, they took advice from the leading legal professionals in Ireland. They listened to that advice. And that was the first wrong thing they did. Listening to lawyers. Their lawyers were advising the Bishops to say nothing, that each case was a legal matter, and that the burden of proof was on those wishing to prove any allegation. So yes the Bishops made a big mistake in listening to their lawyers. And anyone involved in a case where people are being accused of sex abuse or involved in the much more trivial cases that most of you will face at some stage, and who has ignored their lawyers' advice in the handling of those cases, is perfectly entitled to judge the Bishops harshly for doing the same thing. The rest of us aren't. Interestingly the Bishops were being advised to say nothing by many of the same lawyers from many of the same legal firms which have grown fat in recent years trading, on and profiting from, frivolous sex abuse claims and inflated court awards to supposed victims. I always say a victim who helps the Nazi's is still a Nazi. Secondly the Bishops took advice from the most eminent psychiatrists in the world. And they listened to that advice. That was the second wrong thing the Bishops did. Now I could have told them that psychiatrists haven't a clue. But the establishment societal consensus was that psychiatrists were the people to go to when dealing with child abuse. So the second wrong thing the Bishops did was to believe psychiatrists who were telling them that abusing priests had been cured. If you're in a position to judge them for that, go right ahead. I can't. Even though I'm the only one here who's spent the past thirty years telling people that psychiatry and the pharmaceutical industry have monstrously falsified the nature of mental challenges in order to sell billions of dollars worth of mind altering drugs. Thirdly, the Bishops were a little too thrilled to get invites to tea with anti Catholic press baron pornographer Tony O'Reilly. I call him a pornographer because I consider the sex, drugs and hedonistic atheism advocated in his newspapers the Evening Herald, the Sunday World, the Irish Indpendent and the Sunday Indpendent, to amount to pornography. I would also note that Tony O'Reilly still has a publishing deal with British porn baron Richard Desmond to produce the Daily Star. Richard Desmond's other edifying titles include Asian Babes, Big Boobs, and Explicit Readers Wives. He should be most ashamed of the Daily Star though. Yes, the third wrong thing that the Bishops did was to sup tea with Tony O'Reilly, long after it had become clear that his titles were attempting to subvert Christianity in Ireland. One Bishop even consecrated a church for O'Reilly's personal use on the grounds of O'Reilly's horrendously tawdry mansion. That one raised a few eyebrows among believing Catholics. It was plain to see that some of the Bishies just loved mixing with the rich and famous. When they should have been excoriating O'Reilly they were currying favour with him. They relished the plush surrounds of his manion rather than calling for it to be torn down. If you can judge em for it, go ahead. I won't. The fourth wrong thing the Bishops did was to apologise for crimes they hadn't committed. I never apologise Rowena. Because the right sort of people don't want an apology. And the wrong sort will misuse one. The Bishops in their human frailty accepted the public pronouncements of scoundrel liberal atheists who wished to destroy the Church by interpreting every attempt to handle child abuse discreetly as concealment. The Bishops were frightened by the unfolding persecution of the Church through the Media, the Judiciary and Parliament. It's not a crime to be frightened. The persecution seemed unstoppable. The Media, the Judiciary and Parliament colluded to conceal the vast preponderance of the most serious sex abuse cases arising in Irish society outside of the Church and at the same time, the same atheistic Medica, Judiciary and Parliament were pressing ahead with repeated Public Enquiries expressly devised to convince the public that the majority of sex abuse cases actually arose within the Church. A black lie. An utter falsehood. A complete inversion of the truth. And the terrified Bishops just couldn't bring themselves to point it out. The honorable Bishops hid while the Media onslaught continued and the more suggestible proles among our citizenry, the very ones who had bankrupted the nation in perpetuity, these kleptocrats, druggies, abortionists, contraceptivists, atheistic life in test tube generating, Marxists and whore masters, the gangster bankers, the usoriously overpaid middle class teachers, nursies, thug cops and indolent soldiers, all of these thieves, these white washed Civil Service supulchres, all of them I say, presumed, nay dared, to stand in judgement on the faith of our fathers, and on the generations of Irishmen and women who came before us and through hardship, famine and rapine, never bankrupted anyone, the abortionists judged the best among and the best who came before, and from thence it was a short step to find Catholicism guilty of every crime they chose to devise for it. The Bishops didn't fight them. They had grown too comfortable in their palaces and were afraid to lose everything by standing up to the oppressors. Let anyone who's ever faced losing their home in old age stand in judgement on them. That was the fourth and last mistake the Bishops made. You might judge them Rowena. I never will."

a miktam of james

and the numbers we give years
are flung like chaff from the plough
and i am allowed to see
hence and thence and now
people past or passing or to be
come streaming from the fields
i believe

the monica leech laugh in

Snow White was in bed feeling Sleepy. So Sleepy got out of the bed.

Monday, December 26, 2011

saint stephens day

Nephews John and Tom conducting ferocious sword fights in close proximity to my good self.
A wooden sword inadvertently strikes my gentle preraphaelite features.
"Johhhhhhhn," I cry. "What are you doing?"
"Sorry," sez the nephew.
"You two are like the green and blue budgies," I moan. "If I have one of you alone, I can control him. But when you're together I've no control at all."
John thinks for a moment.
"Well sometimes you do," he tells me kindly.

deck the halls with budgies and sheepdogs

Merry Christmas gentle travellers of the internet